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Brian Lageose
@brianlageose
41
Brian was born in Tulsa, Oklahoma on a cold January day in 1965. Clearly, the odds were already against him.
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Location
Dallas, TX
Website
https://brianlageose.blog/
Created
2018-08-14 23:13
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Wallet
brianlageose
funny
8y
Past Imperfect - #327
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brianlageose
funny
8y
Memory Remix: Running On Empty, Part II
Click here to peruse the first part of this story: Amazingly, the confession session with Mom did not turn out to be nearly as brutal as I had anticipated. After all, in the previous fifteen minutes, I
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brianlageose
funny
8y
Memory Remix: Running On Empty, Part I
Once upon a time, my family had a woody. (How’s that for a vague but potentially questionable opening line?) In the interests of fair disclosure and the avoidance of retroactive investigations by Child
brianlageose
funny
8y
10 Things I Learned While Shame-Walking on the Treadmill Today
1. I really hate walking on the treadmill. It’s not the treadmill’s fault. He’s really nice. It’s the concept of exercise overall. Back in the day, when I didn’t have to exercise, but actually had an abundance
brianlageose
funny
8y
20 Random Thoughts After Re-Watching the Very First Harry Potter Movie
1. Wow, those kids look like they’re about 6 years old. 2. Hermione was pretty bitchy back in the day. 3. Daniel Radcliffe/Harry has exactly two facial expressions: “total surprise at being famous for
brianlageose
entertainment
8y
10 Reasons Why Taking A Shower Is Just Like Real Life
1. Some like it hot. These folks reach in, turn the hot-water tap to ultra-gusher, completely ignore the cold-water tap, and then leave the settings like this for the entire three-hour tour. Now, I generally
brianlageose
humor
8y
I Never Knew You Could Do That with a Chicken
A review of Hitchcock's 1969 film, "Topaz"... We start out with some old black-and-white footage of a military parade in Moscow’s Red Square. We know that Hitchcock didn’t shoot this segment,
brianlageose
writing
8y
10 Reasons Why Yard Work Is Not Your Friend
1. Getting the lawn mower out of the shed Once upon a time, we thought it would be really cute to convert the garage into another den, because we had too much furniture in the rest of the house. (I have
brianlageose
travel
8y
Dispatches from the Wasteland: The Turbulence of Tight Spaces
Another snippet from my work-in-progress novel, “Cruise Control”. All you really need to know: It’s the butt crack of dawn, and a massive caravan of my family members is headed to Galveston to embark on
brianlageose
humor
8y
Flash Backward - #2: Inappropriate Social Behavior and Strange Bruises
A long time ago and far away (okay, it was eight years ago and in a neighboring town), I ran a blog series that seemed like a great idea at the time. The following ludicrous artifact is the first installment
brianlageose
humor
8y
Past Imperfect - #345
Evelyn: “What on earth are you doing in my apartment? And why are you holding my diaphragm case?” Inspector: “Is that what this is? I thought maybe you were collecting those little Jewish hats. But since
brianlageose
introduceyourself
8y
Entering Stage Left: A Misguided Desecration of Proper Social Behavior
Brian was born in Tulsa, Oklahoma on a cold January day in 1965. Clearly, the odds were already against him. But he persevered, slugging through this and that, and he quickly learned at a very young age
brianlageose
humor
8y
Dispatches from the Wasteland: Passion Flowers
Note: This is an excerpt from another book-in-progress, one concerning a family cruise in the Caribbean. All you really need to know is that Tiffany is my best friend, Terry is my partner, and things can
brianlageose
humor
8y
10 New Phrases That You Should Add to Your Vocabulary Immediately
1. Frigi-Daze The concept of opening the refrigerator and staring forlornly at the contents, unable to make a decision about what it is that you want to shove into your mouth. You know you want something,
brianlageose
humor
8y
A Totally Random History of America – Part I
2000 B.C. - 999 A.D.: The Native Americans live peaceably for thousands of years. Sure, a few of the tribes were a bit violent, but this pales in comparison to the religious persecutions that were all