No one likes a spoiled kid.
No one wants their kid to be spoiled.
Yet everyone knows a spoiled kid when you see one.
Even more so, most non parents that run into a spoiled kid think to themselves
My kids will never act like that
or
Why is that parent _______ (fill in the blank)
As if any parent is intentionally trying to be average. Most of those non-parent types have probably never tried to travel with an kid under the age of 5. They probably have never had to deal with the illogical response attached to losing a nickel, they almost certainly have never tried to go to the grocery store with a kid. Not to mention having any sort of bodily fluid that does not belong to you smeared on you...
Parenting is hard...and thats why sometimes you win and sometimes you have to recover...
Today I ran into an area I am currently recovering in and want to talk about it...and if you are single and reading this and see a parent cut them some slack and help out instead of judging them...its hard...
So my wife is off fer some business for 4.5days...which means I am flying solo as of this morning. I do my best to enjoy these times...they do not happen that often...but they are not easy. In preparing for the weekend I've got a few things planned but nothing for that afternoon/evening. My intention was to pick up the two big kids from school with my other two in tow, act really excited and pitch the idea that we could do whatever we wanted!
I was excited...and i thought they may be too...wrong.
The only thing I could get out of them was that they were hungry (which I had brought a snack for them - they really just wanted junk food and dad has a tendency to stop by 7-11 for that sort of thing), they missed mom (valid), and the only they wanted was to play wii or go laser tag (what have I done to my kids)
At this point I am trying to handle my personal disappointment. Keep a slightly civil conversation going (the octaves are increasing with every interruption), and actually figure out where we are going...because I am currently driving.
Internally I am both disappointed because I thought it would be fun, but also shocked at how whiny and demanding my children are being.
By the mercy of the almighty God we drive by a natural reserver area, and for whatever reason I pull in and say
Lets go find some bears
And so it begins...
As we were tromping, I was trying to decompress a bit and figure out what happened...
In the monotony of parenting I think I have allowed some levels of whininess and selfishness to prevail in our house over the Summer and into the Fall. Simple things like eating their dinner or feeding the dog would be these back and forth interactions of arguing. These things have become bigger and in someways turned aspects of my kids into little terrors.
That's why we parent.
As the adventure went on, the creativity gradually increased, and I had the kids play some thankfulness games. We turned sticks into massive weapons, we slayed some giants, played Eagle, and yelled really loud things we were thankful for.
It really was a blast. I totally forgot to bring any sort of jackets/sweaters and as a result we put on whatever we could find in the car...and we didn't find any bears. The kids attitudes had totally changed. We were enjoying each other and our dying hunger/thirst seemed to have dissipated. Each of my kids had become genuinely thankful for our current situation.
In reality it was really windy, cold, we were all missing Mom and we didn't see any animals other then some grasshoppers. The shift in us was our thankfulness. It changed everything.
Thankfulness is taught
If your a parent look for ways to practice thankfulness with your kids. It takes time and requires minimal creativity. Ask them around a meal to share what they are thankful for. Practice sharing what we are thankful for about different members of our family or different friends. You may have to shut off the electronic devices - and there may be some initial emotional melt down - but its worth it. Let's develop powerful kids that know what it means to be thankful.
thanks for reading along - Live Big Today and Dominate Life