When it comes to handling a child, i always consider it as a sensitive matter. Any children in their early days were very sensitive and innocent. They have their developing brains and nervous systems which deeply absorb and process every emotional and sensory activity. A child's responses can be disproportionate to the situation, making minor setbacks feel monumental. This requires a careful, highly tailored approach while treating. In my home, I notice a two way of treatment from my uncle and his son towards the kid. While the Grandfather of the child is very strict the kids Dads is handling him very delicately. Sometime the grandfather punishes the kids, while the Dad comes up with the softer or rewarding approach to treat him. Both the approach have their own pros and cons but if they manage to build a balance between the two approach, then it going to benefit the kid in the longer run.
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Early childhood experiences directly shape neural pathways in the kid development. Misunderstandings, harsh discipline, or unexpected changes in routine can trigger a physiological stress response and have lasting impacts on their long-term mental health and confidence. This is why it is often considered to be a delicate affair. We all wants our kids to be a better person, but often we end up punishing our kids. People often punish kids in an attempt to stop misbehavior, exert control, or teach lessons about cause and effect. However, research emphasizes that punishment often backfires. It frequently triggers fight or flight responses, damages the parent-child bond, and teaches children to hide mistakes rather than actually learn from them. As I seen at my home, the kid is scared of his grandfather. although the old man loves him a lot, but on occasion he punishes him for his nuisance. I think such is the cases with many of us. Our older generation always been stricter and harsher. I remember it was always been the case during our growing up phase. While our dad used to stricter, he often surprises us with unexpected gifts and love. They have a matured head and heart, that understands the complexity of being too stricter. This might be the reason that we used to be more respectful towards them, unlike the kids of the new generation, where they often end up too close and friendlier towards their parent. May be too much love and emotion makes them to open towards their parents. But maintaining a boundary is essential for a decent life. some too much love and rewards for the kids mistakes may backfire the upbringing.
Moving from controlling behavior to actually teaching life lessons.
Over the year, we have seen their has been drastic change in the kids upbringing. Time has evolved a lot and so does the technique of parenting. Many experts agree that relying on punishments can trigger resentment, rebellion, and a shutdown of learning in children. Positive reinforcement such as specific verbal praise, a high five, or activity rewards works much faster to shape good habits. Generally, rewards are more effective than punishment for long-term behavioral change. While punishments only temporarily stop bad behavior, rewards help build desired actions and foster positive relationships. However, modern parenting experts suggest combining rewards with natural consequences to teach kids intrinsic motivation and personal responsibility. That is why more and more parents were seen too close and emotionally attached towards their kids. While this work a lot but I believe, somewhere the kids miss out of respecting their parents. There are many cases, where children and kids were drink together,, which is not acceptable in our society.
Guiding, not dictating
In my understanding, balancing punishment and reward is highly effective way of parenting. It leverages both extrinsic motivation and deterrence. It ensures accountability while reinforcing positive habits, promoting mental well-being, and preventing resentment compared to relying solely on strict penalties. Balancing punishment and reward creates a highly effective motivational framework by leveraging both the desire for gain and the avoidance of loss. This approach encourages positive behaviors while clearly defining boundaries, leading to faster learning, higher engagement, and sustained compliance in both personal development and management.
In good faith - Peace!!
