We’ve all been there before. You are talking with your friend about that new car you want and then suddenly...BOOM...an ad pops up out of nowhere on your Facebook feed. It happens literally all the time. I thought the oddest one was a few months back when I was playing disc golf with my cousins. My one cousin Mark mentioned a specific course he enjoyed playing at in New York. Sure enough, a few minutes later in my Facebook feed...up pops an advertisement for that very course. I’ll add I never heard of that course. We were nowhere near that course. It just happened. Our phones are listening...sneaky lil fucks.
About a year ago, I was looking into purchasing a cargo van for the shop. I remember looking through sites on the store tablet. Sure enough, ads popped up on my Facebook feed at home later on. Maybe it linked me through IP addresses? I dunno...either way it’s creepy and is kinda the new norm now.
But what happens when you start getting ads popping up out of the blue that you cant find the reason for?!? That ever happen?!? Because I was scrolling through my Facebook earlier and got bombarded by some weird ass shit through Chinese juggernaut Ali Express....and I do mean weird.
I mean, who doesn’t have a spare $400k lying around for a water park attraction for their yard?!?
The sad part is that mask is better looking than regular me.
Not gonna lie. I kinda want this.
Are you supposed to fuck these?!? I’m confused...
Ok...now I’m really confused! Anyone have any ideas as to what this is?!?
For the outdoor water lover who wants adventure, wedgies, but only has $368 dollars. Also...no fucking way this thing costs $368 smackers. Lies!!!
I’m not judging ladies....seems like a bargain. Not a water slide in your yard bargain like seen above, but a hell of a deal to have a freshened up box while poppin a squat.
Someone made this....which means someone also bought this at some point. Basically I’m saying someone on earth owns one of these shiny metallic gorillas, and that just makes me angry for some reason.
$8 bucks?!? I’m seriously tempted just for the write up about it. I can make that $8 bucks back in upvotes...right folks?!?
At first glance I didn’t think this was odd. Until I noticed the butthole zipper. If this were $8 bucks I’d take the plunge although I think you all would probably downvote that detailed photo heavy write up.
What I’m trying to get at is...what the fuck is wrong with Ali Express?!?!? Also, am I sleep talking some vivid sick shit? Because I’m fairly certain I haven’t discussed water parks, human masks, easy access butthole jumpers, or cooter cleaners recently. Either way, keep the fun coming Ali Express...
Blewitt
