“The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.”
Hello there, full-time weekenders!
One of the things that defines me as a person is what differentiates myself from my parents. Let me start. I was taught from an early age to be careful about trusting people. That only family can be trusted. It sounds nice an old, but experience has shown this isn't how the world goes. Yes, family is important but trust is complex subject. Too complex to be thrown into a black-and-white dichotomy.
So, my best and worst personality trait is the same. My motto in life is:
Trust everyone until they show you why you shouldn't.
This is a dangerous way of living. It sounds bonkers. But it works wonders. You can never be so skeptic as not trusting anyone. That would certainly put you into a slow descent into madness. Doing the exercise of who to trust and who you shouldn't gets easier when you give people the chance to prove themselves without paying attention. It's like a Quantum Mechanics experiment. You're not altering the results by adding your observation into the mix.
In this sense, people will in time become even more trustworthy. It doesn't happen for all of them. Luckily, the bad ones will just do themselves the favor of getting out of your life.
That gets me to the second point. When someone shows me they can't be trusted, they die for me. It's not like I wouldn't forgive petty things. Those do not count for trust. But the accumulation of these and other acts will in due time make me forget them entirely.
So yeah, I'm pretty nice to give everyone a chance into my life, but as easy as they might come in, they will cut off from it.
Since this came out really quick. I'd like to add a bonus fact about some other trait that is both really good and the worst thing ever. I don't have a filter for sincerity. I've read that sincerity without empathy is cruelty. The more I think about it, the more I understand that it has become such a thing since we have made society this cushion for everyone.
The more out lives some comfortable. The more our animal nature permeates into reason. I'd say being cruel in that sense is just a reflection the killer instinct that drives some animals. In this case, I wanna kill you doubts about something. And if people take it personal, well, more problems for them.
But don't get me wrong! I like to receive the same kind of brutal honesty from other people. Trying to make things sound nice just because you don't want to hurt feelings is a tedious exercise. It is necessary in things like education and other parts of life, but being able to withstand the full blow of words is another important skill to cope with the world.
Euphemisms have never helped us with anything. The truth should be as sharp as a blade.
I guess that I'm just the kind of person that you like or hate. There's no in between with me. And if you decide to ignore me because you think you won't like me. You're doing us both a favor. Mostly to me. I don't like dealing with such people.
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