Hello hive lovers.....
I hope this puts a smile on your face or makes you laugh.
The caption above reads, I am not drunk spoken by a full blown drunk. When I saw it,I was immediately transported down memory lane.
This happened when I was a teenager and still living in a notorious community popularly known as Ajegunle in Lagos state, Nigeria. Those who have lived or still live in lagos know that city and they can testify to it's notoriety.
The story I want to share is about a man in that neighborhood called Daddy Bayo (the name is of Yoruba origin, one of the dialects in Nigeria). Daddy Bayo was a father of six children, husband of one wife and he worked as a security guard for a privately owned company, earning eight thousand naira per month. His work allowed for shifts on a weekly basis.
One thing that made Daddy Bayo popular in my neighborhood was his affinity to alcohol. Alcohol was the love of his life. Anytime he was on night shift, expected to return by morning, he always came home drunk.
This issue has caused a lot of quarrels between him and his wife but Daddy Bayo refused to listen or turn a new leaf. This trend continued for years until one fateful morning.
That morning, I woke up at 6am to a lot of noise making outside my compound. At the time my family lived in a face me I face
you compound.( This was a bungalow house with lots of tenants living in it).
I came out to see what the ruckus was all about. I quickly joined the band of onlookers gathered in front of the gutter (drainage) and behold, in there was Daddy Bayo lying flat on his back, his legs spread wide to form the y band on the coat of arms, with his mouth open wide. His liquor beside him long forgotten.
Apparently, he had stumbled into the drain while trying to cross over it in his drunken state. What caused an uproar of laughter and commotion was that, urine was found in his open mouth and Daddy Bayo was just lying inside the dirty drain sleeping and snoring, unbeknownst to him that a passerby had urinated into the drain, straight into his mouth. I am sure the passerby was not aware or he would have looked for another place to ease his bowels.
Some of the neighbors began to call the attention of his wife,
Mummy Bayo,Mummy Bayo,come quickly, come and see your husband here o.
Responding to the call, Mrs Bayo hurried out of their one room apartment,with her wrapper almost loose, to know what was going on.
Who is shouting my name like that?She asked.
One of the oversabi neighbors quickly replied, it's me o, come and see Daddy Bayo, he is sleeping inside the gutter.
When Mummy Bayo bent down to look into the drain and she saw her husband sleeping soundly in the drain, she became sad. She began to wake him up, saying...
Daddy Bayo, Daddy Bayo, wake up and get out of the gutter, let's go inside
Daddy Bayo opened his eyes, looked and said, don't disturb me woman. Can't you see that I am relaxing in my water bed. Leave me alone.
Apparently, Daddy Bayo in his bid to speak had swallowed the urine in his mouth. When the onlookers saw it, they erupted in more laughter which attracted more people from neighbouring houses. Some even began to call him names while others ridiculed him as a drunkard.
Out of shame, Mummy Bayo pleaded with some young men standing around to assist her in bringing out her husband from the gutter. When Mr Bayo was brought out, he was placed on the ground with his back resting on a pole because he could not find his balance.
The next thing he did was to start a record of, I am not drunk, I am not drunk like a mantra.
The onlookers seeing that he has been brought out,began to disperse to their homes one after the other, with a mission to spread the gospel of Daddy Bayo's latest escapade.
That day I went to school late because I had lost track of time while watching Mr Bayo's display but trust me when I got to school,I recounted every detail to everyone who cared to listen and we all had a good laugh.
But Daddy Bayo learnt his lesson after he was told of the urine he swallowed. He divorced the bottle.
Anytime I see a drunk, I remember Daddy Bayo. I doubt I might ever forget that episode.
First time posting in this community.
First image used by tenor
Second Image Source
Thanks for reading...... Shalom
