It irks me when people especially the ones I hold dear, take me for granted. That is exactly what Jake, my boyfriend of three years is doing right now. I am exasperated but what can I do, I love him to death and would readily do as he requested even when I knew the outcome.
Jake and I met in midldle school. He was the most handsome living male I had ever laid eyes on. His black sleek hair complimented his fair skin. His blue-grey eyes made me feel weak in the knees and I knew that I had to have him all to myself.. selfish much? ..yes!
One morning, I collided into him on purpose, he helped me up, apologised and even packed my books.
"Sorry about that I wasn't looking". Jake uttered.
" Its fine, I'm unhurt. I'm Bella, nice meeting you..?" I replied with an outstretched hand. He shook my hand anda said "I'm Jake, nice meeting you Bella". That was the beginning of our relationship, or so I presumed.
We were seen everywhere together from that day. I always managed to be placed in the same group work or project work with him and it was always surreal everytime. We got along well and I did my best to please him and let him know that I was inlove with him. He never really vocalized it but he seemed to get the hint and we just went with the flow. Before long, the whole school called us a couple,Jake neither denied nor affirmed the claims and it stuck.
Three years later and we are still on the last page of our relationship. No one knows how far I've gone to show Jake that I adored him. Asides class projects or other social gatherings, Jake and I have never really gone on a date but I wanted things to change that's why I took the liberty of asking him to come to a restaurant downtown. I had already texted him the address and time earlier that day but I was disappointed to find out that after being an hour late, he still hadn't showed up.
" What could be holding him back?" I questioned out loud. I picked up my phone to dial his number, the call connected but he didn't answer. Unperturbed, I dialed it again and this time the call rang thrice before being diaconnected. " What the heck is wrong with this guy!"
Not wanting to believe that he stood me up on purpose, I left the restaurant and took a cab to his home. I rang the doorbell and was met by his mum. We exchanged pleasantries as she welcomed me inside while telling me that Jake was in his room. I smiled gratefully at her, then climbed the stairs to his room.
I knocked softly on the door twice but when the door opened, Jake was not pleased to see me. I disregarded the feeling and walked in with hom anyway.
" Why didn't you come to the restaurant,babe? I waited for you for two hours, is anything wrong?" I asked in the sweetest way possible. He seemed irritated by my question and he just blurted out "nothing" noncommittedly. I tried walking up to him, to caress and hold him but he quickly dodged, signalling me not to come any closer. I thought maybe he got he the bug or flu but nothing prepared me for the words he said next..
" We need to end this Belle. I can't go on like this anymore. This i not even a proper relationship so there's no need for a formal breakup. I like you as a friend and nothing romantic can blossom between us".
photo by mental health america
I staggered backwards and would have tumbled if not for the reading table that stopped my fall. I looked up at the face of the only guy I had adored through school only to see emptiness. I smiled in self-deprecation as I turned away from his room wordlessly and ran outside."I hate that I love you Jake".. that was the single thought I had as I walked back all alone .
This is my resume to the #aprilinleo initiative for day 17.
Thank you all for reading...shalom.
