Five: Communication

Like most people, I communicate badly at times.

I have a habit of holding things in, not voicing them even with people I love, care about and respect. Part of that stems from not wanting to trouble them with my problems, physical or emotional, and also, once voiced, words cannot be retracted. I've had situations in which I said things that were misconstrued or misunderstood and that's led to complications, pain, suffering and other things, theirs and my own.

So, I'm careful about what I say and when.

It's not always easy especially with the significant people in my life and it has affected them, and probably will again. Knowing that hurts me inside and makes me feel bad, but can I be someone I'm not? I think that's disrespectful to those people and also to myself.

I don't believe communication is becoming easier or better and I don't believe the rise of the internet and mobile phones has helped.

People are connected and can reach across vast distances but I believe they fail to connect person to person or communicate effectively, generally speaking.

I cannot count how many times I've seen couples and groups sitting together all on their phones rather than engaging with each other. That doesn't seem like a secure and valid connection to me. People send text messages back and forth, videos and images on social media, mostly presenting an ideal life that doesn't really exist, and is that a secure and valid connection or communication? I guess maybe it is for those people, but I prefer something more so I work towards communicating more effectively. It's a work in process.

I don't think effective communication has to be verbal. Can love not be conveyed with a tender touch, a look or gesture? Of course it can.

I have been working on communicating more effectively, in words, touch, looks and gestures and feel good about my progress; I still feel reluctant to burden others with my problems, but due to better communication from myself and others that's progressing also.

The truth isn't always a beautiful thing and conversely, words of beauty, emotion and passion are not always the truth. But communication is an important part of being human and it's worth working towards doing it better which is what I have been doing.

Becca 💗

_{I have selected seven words to talk about over seven posts, one a day, this is word five.}