im going to explain this from someone is apart of this type of relationship that its not abuse and its 100% consensual!
here is the difference between d/s ( dominant and submissive)
D/s is about the building of a trusting relationship between two consenting adult partners.
vs
Abuse is about the breach of trust between an authority figure and the person in their care.
D/s is about the mutual respect demonstrated between two enlightened people. vs
Abuse is about the lack of respect that one person demonstrates to another person.
D/s is about a shared enjoyment of controlled erotic pain and/or humiliation for mutual pleasure. vs Abuse is about a form of out-of-control physical violence and/or personal or emotional degradation of the submissive.
D/s is about loving each other completely and without reservation in an alternate way. vs Abuse is hurtful. It is also very damaging emotionally and spiritually to the submissive.
D/s frees a submissive from the restraints of years of vanilla conditioning to explore a buried part of him/herself. vs Abuse binds a submissive to a lonely and solitary life of shame, fear and secrecy… imprisoning his/her very soul.
D/s builds self-esteem as a person discovers and embraces their long hidden sexuality. vs Abuse shatters and destroys a person’s self-esteem and leaves self-hatred in its place.
as for Sm her are some more example of the differences between the two
SM vs abuse
An SM scene is a controlled situation. vs Abuse is an out-of-control situation.
Negotiation occurs before an SM scene to determine what will and will not happen in that scene. vs One person determines what will happen.
Knowledgeable consent is given to the scene by all parties. vs No consent is asked for or given.
The bottom has a safeword that allows them to stop the scene at any time they need to for physical or emotional reasons. vs The person being abused cannot stop what is happening.
Everyone involved in the SM scene is concerned about needs, desires, and limits of others. vs No concern is given to the needs, desires, and limits of the abused person.
The people in the SM scene are careful to be sure that they are not impaired by alcohol or drug use during the scene. vs Alcohol or drugs are often used before an episode of abuse.
After an SM scene, the people involved feel good. vs After an episode of abuse, the people involved feel bad.
BDSM is an overlapping abbreviation of Bondage & Discipline, Dominance & Submission, Sadism & Masochism.
so lets explain what it is
BDSM is a variety of often erotic practices or role playing involving bondage, discipline, dominance and submission, sadomasochism, and other related interpersonal dynamics. Given the wide range of practices, some of which may be engaged in by people who do not consider themselves as practicing BDSM, inclusion in the BDSM community or subculture is usually dependent upon self-identification and shared experience.
iv noticed that many people think that it is abuse and maybe to some people it does but to the submissive its very erotic and just cause you dont like that kind of thing doesn't mean noone else can
its okay to not like BDSM but its not okay to judge .
i hope iv shed some light on this and people can see its not abuse !!
