Hi everyone. This blog title has been sitting on my drafts for months now. I got caught up of making content that fits my "branding" that I forgot about acknowledging my emotions. I composed several paragraphs in my mind but I never got the time, courage and motivation to put in words those thoughts, but I think right now I have.
My year has been a roller coaster. From having a job after almost a year of staying at home due to the pandemic and going back to the same house that I left. I have my reasons why I came back, some might think it was impractical but it was the best decision that I know that time and I feel like it worked out well for me. I'm back in Cebu for almost 7 months of living the rural life in Negros Oriental.
Honestly, there are times that I want to go back there because at least there I have a daily routine that I got used to already. I met many friends and I had so many benefits in working for Anahaw. But I have no regrets about coming back here. I always remind myself of the reasons why I came back, the opportunities it lead me, and the new things I am continuously learning.
I had so many plans when I left Dauin. I was asked by a lot of people what I'm going to do next. The number of plans I had was overwhelming and I was unsure if it'll be possible for me to achieve it. It somehow put a lot of pressure on me to do something for the sake of doing something. Outside, it looks like I'm taking it easy and just keeping it slow but deep inside I was hard on myself and forcing things to happen. I was used to being an overachiever (not sure if I'm still now). I was working on myself in knowing what exactly I want to do with my life. I was told that I'm good in the field of hospitality and I should stick to it but I also want to explore other things but this exploration is not free.
What I know right now is that forcing things to happen doesn't help me in accomplishing the things I want and I have proved it many times. Many times I've been hopeless and just ready to give up, drop everything and run away but there's always a way for the Universe to remind me how far I've come and how I survived many struggles in my life.
Sometimes, I can't help to compare my life from before. A part of me misses the daily routine of my job and its benefits but at the same time, I'm still dealing with the trauma it caused me. For now, I'm blessed with opportunities every now and then from friends and acquaintances. I'm grateful to be surrounded and to be connected with people who are sharing their blessings and their knowledge with me with no expectations of something in return.
To anyone who is reading this and having a hard time figuring out your life please know that you are not alone. Your age, your economic status, your educational attainment should not pressure you in doing something that doesn't serve you. I know, this is not a practical tip and I don't want you to take this literally. Remember that you have the power to curate the life you want to live. There will be struggles but let's face it with power, confidence, and positivity that we will be able to get it through.
Thank you for taking the time to read. This post is kind of personal to me and I want to remember these days of my life by having the courage to post it here.
Asa Si Klause blogs about his travels, vegan lifestyle, yoga practice, his fur babies and anything that gives joy to him.
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