When I was younger, I would be worried that my shoelaces would untie because I couldn't tie them myself. I would ask my Mum every day to tie my laces before I went to school as if the laces did become untied, I wouldn't be able to play with my friends for fear of tripping.
Looking back on it, I could have easily asked an adult to tie my laces for me and then go back to playing, but my childhood mind didn't seem to want to do this. When you look at an issue from the surface, you usually realise how ludicrous it is and how easily it can be solved. However, the 'what ifs' that stick in our mind prevent us from advancing.
When the consequence that you have been fearing occurs, it is dreadful. Of course, some people do not find a partner and have parts of them that are sad and lovelorn, but, you probably think that the chances of this happening to you are quite low.
When you worry, you are less able to problem solve. It is important that you calm down and admit the decisions that there are if your feared consequence did happen. This always makes the problem seem less difficult as you realise that you can rectify the situation.
To put this method into practice, train yourself to ask 'what if' questions to yourself throughout your day. Even better, try to combine this with meditation. Ask yourself 'what if' questions when you take a walk outside or just before you go to sleep. Keep in mind that when your unconscious mind tries to answer these questions, it will probably come back as a mere whisper. Be prepared and listen carefully to your inner voice.
As Mark Twain once said, "There is no such thing as a new idea". It is impossible. We tend to just take our prior thoughts and put them in some sort of mental kaleidoscope. We tend to try and make the past new, which is not possible.
