(me, myself and I - 2018.)
Skip it, you can do much better than one day a year. Every morning before you rush into your own madness and every evening after the noise shuts down, be as weak as you can be strong, be yourself, the worst and the best, don't be blind and don't follow the crowd, you will drown in there.
Don't hide and come forward, say, cry, share happiness, don't be tight-lipped about emotions, take and give, support.
A woman is a woman's best friend or greatest judge.
Written by me some years ago, got it back as a message from a good friend today.
Raised in a patriarchal family, today's day was not much appreciated, unlike the other 364 days. Yes, unfortunately I could say for myself that I know very well when "genders" are treated differently. Apart from the greeting cards made at school, mom did not receive any other gifts, nor did she ever enjoy any benefits, her work as a WOMAN had to be done every day, regardless of her condition and ability, she had an OBLIGATION.
Both female and male, and by male I mean hard work, I myself was not spared from it.
Namely, "men's jobs" were exclusively and related only to providing, women's jobs was EVERYTHING.
Cooking, ironing, raising children, working in the fields, shopping and procurement, cleaning and everything else you can imagine.
Did she enjoy the rewards of her work and effort?
No! Because all that was under obligation.
I grew up with an older brother, who, thanks to the fact that he was born as a boy, always got everything first. On the other hand, although I did everything I was asked to do at home, I can freely say even more (like working in the fields which he despised), I was never rewarded for my efforts, but I still remained under the prism of a "female child".
Did it hurt? Do I still fell it nowdays?
Yes and yes.
I despised the sentence "you are a woman."
I remember all my life one situation after which I literally decided to leave home as soon as I turned 18, scooters became popular at that time and most kids had them, even my female friends, I wanted one (I loved motorcycles and bikes always), did I got it?
No, cause I was a girl. If my memory serves me well, maybe I was around 15 years old at the time, that answer confused me, because as I mentioned, my female friends had it.
What is wrong with me? Why am I different from my own brother, from other female children? Why I'm not deserving it, just cause of my gender?
And so I promised myself that I will never fall into the hands of men (nor anyone else), who will determine what I am worth and how much.
And then throughout my life many more situations appeared, in which I also met women who enjoy belittling other women, men who exclusively objectify and evaluate based on that, bosses who suggested that I use my "female attributes" in order to get a better position at work, ramps that came down just because I'm a woman, and partners who hid behind my womanly back.
Did what Klara Cetkin fought for bear fruit or did all of that lead us down the wrong path?
Maybe the pots got a little confused. Today I watched a documentary with the same title as this post, children's writer Matt Welsh tried to find the answer to WHAT IS A WOMAN, is it just the genitalia or is it about something else. In fact, the entire story of the documentary has nothing to do with the topic of March 8, it refers to "sex change", what surprised me was the fact that even many women did not know the answer to this question.
And then I set it for myself.
I am currently enjoying the monthly blessing given to women, and the second day I am in incredible pain, blessed pain.
We all carry two energies within us, male and female, the left side belongs to the woman, the right to the man. Therefore, none of us is exclusively one or the other, we are the essence of both.
Women are nurturers, creators, refuges, fighters, the strength that a woman possesses a man will never (no offense), nature just arranged it that way. And there is the point to some extent, that we, as an essence composed of both sexes, cannot be different except in the physical sense. We are dependent on each other, without each other we do not exist.
So where does so much separation and belittling of female children come from?
From the stupid old customs, where the male child is the heir of the lineage, the bearer of the surname, the extension, even though that male will need a female in order to achieve all of the above. It seems that nobody (at least in my area) is aware enough.
Then where did that unwritten rule come from that only a woman takes care of the house, washing dishes, cooking...?
Aren't we using it all together?
Maybe it's the equality that feminism is fighting for today, when was the last time you heard that a woman assaulted a man? Since the beginning of the year, 9 women have died in my country, for whom it was concluded that they were to blame. Female professors in schools are mistreated by students, who suffered no consequences, and they are returned to work as if nothing had happened - traumatic.
Hats off to Spain, the country in the world that adopted "menstrual sick leave".
I don't even want to remember how many times I cried at the workplace because the pain was unbearable, and yet I had to greet clients with a smile and pretend that everything was fine. Countless of my friends have worked until late in their pregnancy because otherwise their pay would have been cut by 30%. One of them experienced physical violence during her pregnancy, in which her mother-in-law also participated. I found out about it too late, luckily she is happily divorced today. She was beaten for no reason, she had to ask for permission to go out, and then as a sign of apology she was given expensive things, I guess they thought that would wash away their dirty conscience.
I don't want a flower, I want a revolution.
Rename the equality of the sexes to the equality of human beings, because when andro and menopause overtake us, that is all that remains of us, a naked human being.
So what is a woman?
An adult female person, was the writer's wife's answer.
I still haven't formulated my answer, I fell asleep soon after watching, but I know what a woman is not:
A trophy, a maid, a mother to her partners, a less valuable merit, a housewife, obeyed.
Dear men, you can do so little every day for your "better" half to make her feel better, wash your plate after yourself, fold your wardrobe, make a meal for your wife/girlfriend/mom at least once a week, because they do it for you every day ( and it is not their obligation), listen and under no circumstances declare her manic when she is in "those days", because you have no idea how confusing that condition can be for us as well, don't make fun of her vulnerability. Show emotion, make her smile, give her a compliment, don't grab her ass like you're a savage (maybe sometimes it's fun, but it's often irritating), respect her as your equal, be there when you're needed, don't turn your head because you need us too as much as we do you.
In good and evil.
Being a woman is wonderful, even though I still don't know "what a woman is", be happy about it every F day.