I have wondered, pondered, and even considered... Okay,, that is a bad opening. so let's try again.
I'm of the opinion(which is already popular) that cats are the greatest assholes of the animal kingdom. They make loud statements about how well they ignore you. Come on, think of it. A pet you adopted, feed, bathe, and scratch(when they want you to) giving you a shun when you call out to them.
"Cats have no economic value" someone once tweeted. We all laughed, but trust me apart from those who sell them(a rare case in my country Nigeria), what other economic contributions do they give than to command you to change their litter and feed them.
"We are pets to cats"
Aren't we? Tell me, aren't we? only that in this case the pet feeds the pet-owner, and cleans the pet-owner stinking toilet, and helps the pet-owner groom themselves. in return for what? in return for the pet-owner sitting on the pet's laptop while the pet tries to earn a living, in return for some attention from the pet-owner, and the annoying meow of the pet-owner that must not annoy the pet.
Aren't humans blessed to be graced by the presence of such jobless pet-owners? and yes! yes! the pet-owners are so dedicated to life they spend 65-80%of their day resting, 10% of it eating, 5% yawning and a whooping 5% meowing for their pets attention. Did I omit their concentrated staring at a thing of much importance that's too important to be seen by the pet's eye?
Our beloved furry saviors do not get angry, oh! they never do except once in a while when they are frustrated by their inability to squeeze the futile life out of a bird who is guilty of flying while our gracious pet-owner only walks. silly birds! Did I tell you that you can get the pet owners to be furious when you let your silly tissue papers lying around? the furiousness of these gracious creations who have been sent to save mankind metamorphs into art in how they shred the tissue papers, expertise humans have been foolish enough not to study.
I want to go on and on, and on and on, and as a cat would go when it sights a hanging thread. but I'm just a pet needing to emulate my pet owner by sleeping in the day for at night we were awake!
Meowdious!
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