I met up with an old friend for lunch. We have known each other for more years than I care to count and typically catch up once a year, usually just before summer.
Something was different this year. Last year when we met I wasn't on Steemit.
So we sat down. Looked at each other over a coffee. We both grinned like the royster doysters we had been in yesteryear. I am sure the same escapades that were running through my head were running through his. The time we drunkenly attempted to ride a trolley down the steepest hill in town (didn't go well) Or when we had a contest to eat the most chillis blended in milk (didn't go well). Ah the good times!
So whatcha been up to? My old matey chops beamed. No doubt expecting a tale where I drunkenly attempted to milk a cow.
Eh, phew. Not much, or rather millions. Erm, aye. Lots of stuff actually, I joined this site, it's amazing!
Aw aye, Ye buying a bride! - He was rather pleased at that one.
We both laughed. I leaned forward.
It's better than that actually, It's a blogging site, you literally get paid to blog.
Do ye fuck! He guffawed.
It does, depending on how many votes you get it...
Aye right. Naw it doesnae!
Seriously, it does. Depending on how many votes you get and from whom...
From whom, whom? WHOM? Who says WHOM? Are you the Queen noo?
Fucking hell, this was tough, I steered the conversation around to him. Fast forward ten minutes. I got the updates on his marriage and job. He was going for a new job as his old one was shit and his wife appeared to be doing his nut in (translation for the non scots. Being a little tiresome).
I had obviously piqued his interest though. It seemed like no time before he was asking me about this mad site that paid you money.
I decided to keep it simple and explain that everyones vote had weight and was worth cents, ranging from fractions to many. His eyes lit up.
So it's dollars they pay you in then?
Oh god thought I. Here we go. Yeeessss, sort of, its a cryptocurrency they pay you in.
A whit, a crypto whit?? Wait. Are you gettin humped? (Translation for the non scots - Dear fellow, is someone taking advantage of you?)
It's like Bitcoin. I sighed.
I have managed to convince a few folk to join Steemit and many more to consider it but some people will never join. Usually the kind of people who brandish an old Nokia phone at you with a screen the size of a stamp and loudly proclaim that it does everything they need and the battery lasts for 8 months.
Bitcoin? Are you wan o' they scammers noo? Dawg, whit kind of dodgy shit are you up tae!?
I smiled in defeat as I sipped the last of my coffee.
Aye, that's me. I'm a scammer who buys brides off the internet.
We laughed and then like any true Scotsmen talked about the rain and how it was doing our nut's in.
When I got back to work I made a resolution. Next time I would stick to tales of drunken derring do.
For bonus lols I took a photo of myself making a face and sent it to him because I know his old shitey phone can't receive MMS's and it does his nut in.