Learn To Say No Just For One Day

A good life lesson is to simply choose to say no to something, say it to yourself a day before. Tell yourself you can do it the next day but not tomorrow. The day after tomorrow, maybe yes. Don't wait until you are in the moment. That makes it much harder to say no as you are in it.

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You have to plan it ahead of time. At the same time, don't be too unrealistic and say you will never ever do a bad habit, a bad lifestyle, a bad choice, a bad decision, a bad direction, a bad addiction, etc, etc, fill in the blanks here. It doesn't even have to be bad or good. That is not the most important thing here.

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Don't make up too many excuses, reasons, distractions, faults, blame, rabbit trails, symptoms, etc. Don't get lost in thinking about why whatever you did might be ok or understandable or not too bad or so on and so forth, Don't get distracted by these thoughts, desires, feelings, beliefs, etc.

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What really matters is digging deep into who you want to be. Focus on who you are and who you strive to become. We are human and we make mistakes. But don't fall for the lie that says you have to do certain things. The secret is that you can say no to things. But the secret lies in procrastination. That is part of the secret.

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So, when you are ready, any day now, you can simply purposely procrastinate on a bad habit. And again, it does not have to be a bad habit. It can be a good habit. It can be simply not the best habit possible. What is important is that you prioritize the choices you make. But the secret lies in not just focusing on what you want to do but also in understanding the the things which you want to do short-term speaking which does not align with your long-term aspirations.

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Get a notebook and write down short-term habits and desires. Write down things you do and things you want to do on a daily and weekly basis. After that, write down a list of more long-term habits and goals which you do and which you try to do on a monthly and yearly basis. After that, try to draw lines between which short-term things can help with which of your long-term things. Put stars on some of your favorite items.

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Don't just list things you want to do. Also list things you do both good and bad. Be honest with yourself, nobody else has to see your list. Write down everything you do on a short-term and long-term basis. You can even underline items and you can even use highlighters. But after that, then find short-term items which are hindering your long-term items and circle them. After you find out which of the short-term items are getting in the way of your long-term items, then make a new list of just those short-term items and include when these items happen, when, where, why, how, who, what, what for, how often, etc.

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After that, you can then make a plan to simply procrastinate on one of those short-term items for just one day. And simply commit to it. You can write it down. You can tell an accountability partner or friend. But make it easy and tell yourself no to a particular item. It is not enough to just say yes to things you want to do because certain short-term items will get in the way of the things you want to do. So, it is your life and you have the freewill to do what you want to do both good and bad.

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Take it a day at a time and simply plan a day ahead. Tell yourself not tomorrow on any particular short-term item. Mentally prepare yourself. Spiritually and emotionally set yourself to saying yes to certain things and also no to certain things. It is not necessarily that you have to specifically say yes to a long list of things you must do for a particular day. Well, to some extent, that may already be built-in. You may already have a set of short-term and long-term responsibilities, meaning things you do and things should do and things you must do and things you tell yourself to do and things you choose to do and things you are told to do.

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So, it can be common sense and self-explanatory to focus on responsibilities, obligations, duties, jobs, careers, chores, homework, school work, house work, yard work, errands, maintenance, laundry, dishes, garbage, cleaning, housekeeping, babysitting, etc. But at the same time, on top of that, it is important to plan ahead to say no to something every once in a while as a means of discipline. Your ability to grow as a person can come at a steady pace as opposed to sudden and radical change. You could reform how you live your life overnight. You could change a million things about how you live your life. You could make a list of thousands of things you want yourself to do and not do starting this very second. Now, I'm not going to tell you not to try that. You can do whatever you want.

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But what good will it be if you are unable to maintain a major lifestyle shift long-term speaking? Habits can take 30 days to form. But you should take it a day at a time. And understand that there are certain short-term items on your lists which will always be there. Don't think you can make these items disappear forever. Think of these short-term items as weeds. So, say in your heart you will pluck a particular weed for a day. Just a day. Just pledge to yourself you will pluck out the weed for a day. Understand the weeds will continue to pop up again and again. Understand that the weeds may not necessarily be who you are. Don't be surprised when you see weeds grow from the garden of your soul. Just remember you're the gardener.

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You're the farmer of your life. Farming takes a lot of work. Don't lie to yourself. It takes a lot of work to garden and to farm in general. So, therefore, take it a day at a time. But plan ahead. Tell yourself which things you will do and not do for a particular day. You don't have to make a plan for each day. And you don't have to say no each day. But as often as you can, try to plan on a coming No Day. As you prepare to sleep, write down a No Item on paper. Go to sleep thinking on how you will not do that one thing until the day after tomorrow. Wake up and look at that list you made yourself and keep looking at your list throughout the day.

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Then go to bed that day saying to yourself you did it, you did it. And you can always plan to do it for the next day. You can choose to continue the fasting to not do a particular thing for an additional day or you can come back to it in a week or a month or a year or a decade. And then when you are ready to procrastinate or fast from a particular short-term item for just 24 hours, then write it down and do it. The hard part is feeling like you're going to die or something if you don't do the particular short-term item.

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If you don't have the confidence and will power to say no to something for 24 hours straight, then how about 12 hours or six hours? Make it a shorter time period or go find a friend who can help you say no to something for a short period of time. Good luck.


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