How do you know it is the last time?
You don’t.
Since end of May I am on an expedition over mountain peaks through deserts, crossing countless borders, getting to know far and strange parts of this beautiful earth.
So far by cycling over 5’000 kilometres all the way from France to the south of Turkey.
But as I move and observe changes in my thoughts and ways, this journey itself is about to evolve, change. I have come way further then I would have ever believed on my two wheels. Now it is finally time to accept the change and say goodbye.
Goodbye to my trusted fellow. The bike.
Melancholic, because I am now, already idealizing all the struggles I was cursing just a few weeks back.
Exciting, because only change will bring new ideas and perceptions, and I can’t wait what all the other counties, that lay on my way, will have to offer.
Would I have done something different the last day I cycled, if I knew it was the last one? Maybe I would have appreciated it more?
But this is only my brain, trying to trick me with holding on to “the last time”.
To fully appreciate this bikepacking expedition I need to let it change into something new. Let it go.
I want time to think, think of something else than camp-spots and avoiding traffic.
Nevertheless I will miss it. Miss the feeling of empowered freedom, when I mount on my saddle and know I have every thing I need attached to those two wheels. Pedalling through empty wilderness and know I can decide to put up my “home” for that day where ever I want.
Isn’t that what makes the good choices of life? They are hard to take but exciting to think of!
The first day with a backpack on my shoulders. Now I am the donkey.
As the landscape passes by outside the bus window I am glad not to cycle past those trucks and heavy traffic. When we have to wait ten hours for the next bus, I remember how good it was to only rely on ourselves for transport.
It didn’t even take me one full day to both, regret and adore the decision to leave the bike behind.
Thank you for passing by, enjoy your day!
All photos and words are my own.