Creative Nonfiction ~ fear of making mistakes

To me, the first time to do something always makes me nervous because I don't know if that thing will be successful or not.

When I was acquiring the skill of making hair, work seemed easy and smooth because there were lots of apprentices and we all worked together. I am the type that loves to practice a lot because the more I work, the better I become with whatever I am doing.

I am a hairdresser and throughout my time as an apprentice, I have never regretted a day, I never get scared of any hairstyle because I don't work alone, and that makes the work easy. I did every work assigned to me with ease until I completed my training and started to work all by myself.

"Dara, you take the back of the hair while I do the front side," that was how I and my boss worked despite having so many apprentices but she noticed that I was focused and I don't get scared of doing something so she put me to work always.

When I left my boss's shop I realized that it is not easy to be a boss and the first hair I plaited for a customer made me nervous. Starting from the price I couldn't give the customer a price because I was scared she wouldn't pay, but I managed to give the price and when it got to the part where I was supposed to make the hair, I began to sweat profusely. I was nervous and even the customer could see it.

"Can you plait this hair? It looks like you are nervous," The customer asked.

"Yes, I can. It's very easy," I assured her but my hands were trembling while holding the attachment she wanted to use.

"Madam, why are you sweating so much?" The customer asked again in less than five minutes.

"That is how I sweat whenever I am working," I replied.

All that was on my mind was not to make mistakes because if my boss had been there she would have told me how to start and that would have given me boldness to face the customer.


My shop image

"If you can't do it just let me know and I will change the style," the customer said to me and I just smiled.

It would be degrading of me to say I can't and she might not come to make hair from me again since it was her first time.

Meanwhile, I can make the hair I was just scared of making mistakes while doing it since my boss was not there to monitor it.

"You have nothing to worry about ma'am, the breeze was not enough and that was why I sweating so much not because of your hairstyles," I replied with a fake smile on my face still trying to get back my courage to start the hair.

I started making the hair but the first three lines that I part on her head seemed like I was making a mistake already at the end, I was able to make the hair for her exactly how it was in the picture she showed me, and that was when my mind was at peace.

I never stop being nervous about making hair for customers but it was not as much as when I first started working alone and now that I have a shop to call mine I don't always feel nervous that much because now I am getting used to making hair alone and I can cope with different characters from customers now unlike when I just started.

Now as a boss, I don't feel nervous to make hair all I do now is that if I can't make the hair I now have the boldness to tell the customer I can't, instead of putting myself into an awkward situation that will make me nervous.

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