Last Birthday LoH #109

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I would be clocking in on my 24th next week. It feels surreal that I'm close to my silver year here on earth. With the little meaningful experiences, I gained, I'm happy to be able to live life with such longevity.

I came from a family that is not into grand birthday celebrations. However, they still make the day meaningful by celebrating it simply. We just invite a few family friends over for dinner and send food to a few neighbors and relatives.

Birthdays are overrated for me before because I'm so bitter about them. I don't know how to respond whenever someone would greet me. Many times, I'm disappointed after my birthday as I don't feel special and celebrated at all. I expect a lot therefore, I feel disappointed easily.

However, I realized that I shouldn't base my happiness on other people. It's my birthday and it's my job to be grateful for the year and value added to my life. I fathomed that it's necessary to make the most of every day considering that everything is fleeting. We'll never know when our life would end.

If this year will be my last birthday, I would celebrate it in a way that is aligned with my liking. I pictured my last birthday to be my escape. I want to go soul-searching. Away from the people I love and the people who know me. I want to be in a place where I'm a stranger. There in that place, I would live the remaining days of my life. I wanted to spend even just a little time without worrying about someone else. I want to be free from the responsibilities and the judgment of others.

In that way, I can feel and enjoy my freedom. I would live my life without worrying about anyone but myself. I think it's time to prioritize myself.

I wonder when would that birthday be.

Thank you so much @irenenavarroart for this wonderful prompt. Truly, moving and worth reflecting on.

*Lead Image is mine and edited in canva

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