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One bad habit I can remember having as a child till my teenage age was always keeping quiet and crying whenever I was wrongly accused of doing what I didn't do.
I grew up in an extended home; we had different family members leaving with us and also visiting us often., so my dad treated everyone equally. Whatever he was getting for his kids, he would get the exact thing for whoever was at home at that moment.
There was this particular day after we got back from school (primary school), I washed my school uniform together with my vest and spread it on the line.
The following morning, as we were preparing for school, I went to pick up my uniform and vest, and then my cousin dragged the vest from me, saying that it was hers. Upon hearing our voices, her mom rushed out to know what was happening.
I explained to the mom and told her the best was mine, not her daughter's. She called me a liar and asked me to prove it.
My dad hearing us argue came out of the room to know why we were arguing that early instead of preparing for school.
Before I could open my mouth to explain to my dad what was happening, my aunt started explaining to my dad, and in the process, she called me a thief and a liar.
Then my dad faced me to hear from me, but I could not explain myself because I was already hurt and pained from my aunt's words.
Then my dad said since you can't explain and defend yourself, that means you are guilty. In his words, he said those who cry when something happens are usually guilty.
I grew up hearing that phrase too many times, because whenever something happens and I am accused of it, I usually find it difficult to express myself because of the hurt, so I end up keeping silent and crying.
This got me into too many troubles and made me looked like a stubborn child.
Well, about the vest, my cousin saw her's in the room that same morning, and they returned mine to me. But you know African parents with pride—no one apologized to me.
This annoying habit of mine kept going on till in my SS 1 when I was wrongly accused of something I didn't do, and my classmates were raining insults on me while some were threatening to beat me up.
I don't know where I got the courage from and started answering and replying to everyone of them; all of a sudden everyone was quiet, and they started steering at me. They were so surprised at me.
Then I met with the person who started the whole thing and confronted her. By the end of the day, the whole issue was resolved, and some of my classmates apologized to me.
After the whole incident, someone met me and said she had never seen me angry and that I looked scary when I was talking and shouting.
That was how my own breakthrough started. The crying baby in me died, and a bold me was born.
I realized that being quiet and reserved to an extent does help.
People often look for someone they can trample on.
images are mine
THANK YOU FOR READING TO THE END 🤗