Hello Hive,
I'm tapping the keyboard expressing my thoughts as they flow, while I snap a selfie - As I Am.
My husband and I have plans to go home to see my parents and family back in Jamaica in a month or so. My parents are aware of my plans, well, my vague plans which is that I hope to be home in October.
They were excited by this news because by then it would be just shy of 9 years since they last saw me, and I'm the youngest.
I've had obligations and done some traveling to places far away from home which made my return challenging; So now that my planning is falling into place, I try hard to contain my eagerness about seeing my parents and sister, because I feel blessed that they are alive and well.
My parents, friends, and family are always happy to hear from me whenever I give them a buzz, and occasionally they'll see a glimpse of me in a photo or video call. However, there's nothing like seeing someone in the flesh.
Over the years since I last saw them, there have been physical changes naturally, but I would say there's a bigger change in my spirituality, mindset, and my persona. I have learned so much about life, people, the world around me, and most valuable, about myself.
Even though my time away has been with my husband, it hasn't been easier being away from my dear parents. I have faced trying times, sad times, and many happy times too. For some time, I struggled emotionally and felt like I was drifting away from my parents and my culture and I would sometimes worry unnecessarily about their well-being. I had to change my mindset and adjust my perspective by looking deeper into what I was experiencing. I had to grow up and become more resilient while accepting the cycle of life, understanding grief, and letting go without losing sentiments, love, and deep connections.
Now I am more aware of the wider world, and how I fit into it, and I see myself as a global citizen. This I'm sure my parents will identify with and feel proud of.
There's much uncertainty and doubts about my future in many aspects. My life feels like a puzzle, yet I feel like my journey and the pieces of my life have been falling into place. I have tuned into my inner child of appreciating and connecting with the simple, intangible resources of the earth and I feel myself detaching emotionally from the superficial, materialistic world, and each day I grow fonder of animals, and nature, and feel a sincere sense of gratitude for life, and a purpose in the universe. This has somehow made me feel a sense of freedom to live my life the way that suits me, as I give everyone else the freedom to do the same with theirs.
I've encountered bitterness, like that of the taste of fresh lemons in my glands, that has made me woke!
I am thankful. I no longer try to see only the good in people; Instead, I see the good, the bad and the ugly, and I accept people entirely, and act accordingly.
As I Am
When I look at myself in the mirror, I see a different me, and I'm bombarded with what looks like a gallery of flaws. Still, I have grown less fond of makeup, and I embrace my imperfections and see them as uniquely me:)...Unmasked!
... and you know what?
I love the person I see in the mirror.
It's still a long time before I'll return home, and I'm counting the days.
I am looking forward to my dad showing me the engine of his car; the correct oil level, the condition of his tyres, the precise measurement of air that he puts into each tyre, and the reasons why he does it that way. My dad will show me all his vitamins and eyedrops while telling me all the benefits of them.
My mum and I will spend time in the garden; She loves gardening. While I'm sure my sister will travel a few miles across Jamaica for spending a few days hanging out at the beach.
I take nothing and no one for granted, and I want to dedicate quality time to them.
I do have photos of my parents dressed up for special occasions, However, what I am looking forward to the most, is hugging them, and hearing their voices...and I wish for the chance to capture candid shots of them doing the things that they love the most in their true authentic selves. That would become my favourite memorabilia.
Thanks for being here, and I'll share my travels with you:)
