I used to believe that life has ups and downs, much like a lifeline. I never imagined that it would temporarily reach its flatline before it goes to what we called “new normal”. This is what my mind came across as I scroll the photos on my phone.
This photo always makes me think of my last escape prior to lockdown. My friend in highschool celebrated his birthday in Anawangin, Zambales. It was already set so we decided to push through. I badly needed this vacation to relieve some of the pressure that comes with my job.
The next morning, the president then declared a lookdown. I did not see this coming, nor my family or my friends. My initial thought was, “Hell yeah! I needed this long break” and “paper works are unstoppable except for me”. Lol. Days turned into weeks then months, and then the next thing I knew, is that this madness was not funny anymore. We are not supposed to be outside. Literally!
What then did this extrovert do while lockdown? So hivers, do not judge me, but everything that got hyped during quarantine was also “my thing”. This is already part of our life and history, which is why I wanted to share it. What had happened was a turning table of everything. This helped me realize that life must flow freely like falls in the middle of an enchanted forest or a cycle of a butterfly.
Here are the “few” achievement I unlock during lockdown and I know some of you will relate to this.
As a coffee enthusiast, this was the best contribution of lockdown.
It took me three days to figure out how much coffee or milk I should add. And when I found the right formula, guess how many cups of coffee I drink in a day? Lol.
I tried baking cookies and pastries.
Who among you looked for your ovens and start the magic? I got interested in baking like you too. I bake every other day until I get the perfect sweetness, color, chewiness or crunchiness of the deserts. It even came to the point of me selling it! Thank God I did not get diabetes that time.
I made my first ever tiktok account and posted my first ever video. (Seen only by friends)
Who promised themselves that they will stay as a viewer in tiktok and not create a tiktok account? It became a guilty pleasure however, this platform has been a huge survival tool for me. My fyp was mostly made up of trivia questions, “life lately” videos, food reviews and tiktok dance challenges.
From 152 lbs. (69 kg.) down to 130 lbs. (59 kg.) within three months.
I eat when life hits my cortisol (stress hormone) and serotonin (happy hormone). In addition, let us be honest that most of the time we do not pay much attention to our weight especially during lockdown. When I look at the mirror, I felt ugly and sad. I cannot unsee an inflated balloon. Lol. So I made the decision to create a meal plan and workout plan for myself. Again, it was not easy, but acceptance and allowing myself to enjoy my progress helped me. Filipinos would call it “balik alindog” .
My family put up a small business online in order to contribute to the community.
People were really risking their health just to go out and buy their necessities for their families. Our family made an effort to help in our own little way. We were delivering vegetables, fruits and even sacks of rice for free. We post on social media and group chats of family and friends in Makati and Taguig area. That business had a great year for us and made us appreciate more of life.
Being an educator, particularly in my subject, MAPEH was DIFFICULT. Caps lock to make it more intense. Lol
No one is prepared in an online mode of teaching. It seems like you are just doing zoom calls with your students and chatting with them about how life is instead of teaching. But, do not get me wrong, I teach because that is what I am supposed to do. I thought doing video recordings of athletics skills to be shown to the kids was just an easy task but I was wrong. I remember being a troubleshooter every time a student panics because he/she cannot access my tasks. Intermittent connection or sudden blackout that nearly caused me a mini heart attack was a big deal especially if I am giving a major test. It would just create a huge teamwork for them. Those moments were truly something and made me burnt out.
I always pray every night before going to sleep. Praying that the pandemic must end soon and hoping that people could get the cure to this global concern. A lot of people had been defeated by this. It was an eye opener on what comes next for me or to my career. I must admit that my performance is not what it was prior to the pandemic. I always felt the exhaustion, laziness and the pain that I carry on my back. I started to doubt my career and passion and I could not even celebrate or be happy with my own promotion for the school year 2021-2022. I thought that the pain I am feeling will pass in just one blink of an eye. But I was wrong. I was a candle melting away as my light flickers. After that school year, I started to write my resignation and thinking of working overseas.
And now that I am here, in a more diverse place, I can start fresh like a new born baby. I choose to leave because I wanted to get out of my comfort zone. As you all know, I wanted to be more because I believe I can be more.
I want to leave you this question, what was your turning point or epiphanies during the lockdown? I want to hear your part too. And see you on the next blog.
All images are mine unless stated otherwise.