Photo credit 'Women's Fitness'
Last month I had to go for my mammogram and ultrasound check at the hospital. This is the annual routine that I have been doing ever since I was diagnosed with the big C (breast cancer) 5 years ago.
For the past 4 years, I have been diligently going for my follow up checks with all my doctors. During those times, I did not fear these checks, didn’t give much thought to it as I know that whatever the outcome, I will deal with it just as I had done when I was first diagnosed with BC.
However, this year was different. I was nervous, jittery and anxious for my upcoming checks. I was into my 5th as a cancer survivor and this will be the year where my oncologist determines if I am to stop taking the medication to control my BC. In these 5 years, this is my finishing line. The race stops here, one milestone completed.
So, why so nervous and jittery about this year’s checkup? I was afraid, I was worried, what if my test results were not favourable? I can see the finishing line but can I make it?
Life changed for me since that day when I was diagnosed. I made more effort to take care of myself and to be healthy, which means giving up some of my favourite food, exercise more, be more patient, learn to let go and much more. A lot of conscious effort were made, a lot of trials and tribulations because I want to finish the race and touch the finishing line.
Thankfully, my test results came out Ok, I could not ask for more. Happily, I went to see my breast surgeon. While she was encouraging and happy for my results, she then went on to inform me that it would be best that I continue another 5 years with a different medication. Huh? Another 5 years of medication? Didn’t they tell me that it was only for 5 years? Surprise surprise! So, there now, another 5 years of medication, and another finishing line to race to.
Where do these finishing lines ever end? We chart many goals in our lives but these finishing lines don’t just end there. We merely cross over them and start another race…..
Photo credit 'Reflection from me'