Comedy Open Mic Round 34 - Reet Posh Food on a Budget - Breakfast

Ever spent a year writing on a crypto blogging platform only to have the market crash like a tone of sh#t just when you thought it was all gonna be gravy?

Ever sold your spleen to fund a trip to Krakow?

Or followed the rice and spinach diet like a complete tit thinking that was the holy grail of money saving ideas?

Ever lost an eye to a hungry koala bear while trying to harvest his eucalyptus leaves for your morning tea?

Or sold your car for scrap because the handbrake stopped working three months ago and it would cost more to fix it than it's worth?

Ever battled a hungry tramp over the last slice of moldy sausage in the trash?

Or bolted the broken brakes on your bike to the handlebars with cable ties because you can't afford a new set?

If like me, you can answer 3 or more of these questions YES... then this is the post for you!

Astound bore your friends with your superior budgeting skills!

Annoy Wow your friends on Facebook & Instagram with amazing pictures!

Impress confuse your significant other with gourmet flavor combinations!

I would like to assure convince you that is sieved fresh allotment tomatoes, and not as it looks, some type of Masai cows blood soup.

So, now that your appetite is sufficiently wet-ed... lets get on with the gourmet breakfast on a budget.

Instead of doing the usual steemit recipe I decided to channel one of my many personalities to explain how to make the gourmet open sandwich pictured in the title of this post. To learn how to make Reet Posh Fu#king Toast, check out the video below. I must warn you that there will be no more half-arsed half-swearing in the video presentation.

Please do let me know in the comments if you have made the ultimate posh Fu#king sandwich as I would love to hear your experiences! I honestly made it today and it is Reet fckn nice. BTW's Reet means real or really in Yorkshire speak.

Did it make you want to go to the Algarve?
Are you now completely fascinated by where the fu#k Barnsley is?
Are you seriously turned on by Percival's gravely voice and want to know how you can meet the man himself?
All of these questions and more can be made clear 😉 I am thinking of making him a regular feature to steemit Comedy open mic but am unsure if he is a little too 'Brit style' humor to translate on steemit. Let me know what you think, thanks.

If you would like to join a fantastic community where we strive to help new steemians grow and develop, why not join me at #promo-mentors discord group which you can find here.

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