Chukwuma stumbled out of the cab, he could barely stand on his own. Yet he rejected the driver's offer to walk him to his door.
"Don't worry I'll find my way." He mumbled, waving the driver off with shaky hands.
He couldn't feel his head. It was spinning like a merry-go-round. He could still taste the bitter taste of alcohol on his tongue or whenever he belched. It had been a wild night partying with friends,
He dragged himself towards the estate gate. Staggering and mumbling words that weren't audible. Unaware of an estate security man standing by.
“Oga, are you okay?” the security man asked with concern.
Chukwuma raised his thumbs up in a clumsy thumbs-up, staggering past him. He feared opening his mouth to talk let alone shout back at the security. He might throw up in the process and that will ruin his steeze. He paused, stood upright with face held high all in a bid to regain his composure. The night air was cool but it didn’t help his head. When it felt like the world wasn't spinning again in his head. He moved on, trying so much not to stagger, but no matter how he tried, it was futile.
Finally, his apartment was in sight. Unfortunately, all the buildings looked the same. The same white paint, brown doors, same number plates. Just the scribbles were different.
He got to what seemed like his apartment and squinted at the doors.
"Block C… or is it Block B? Definitely B" he muttered. His words are slurry. Then he staggered to the door and pressed the door button. The door clicked open. “Told y'all. Home,” he smiled to the imaginary voices in his head.
He got in and turned the lights on. Kicked off his shoes, leaving one in the parlour and the other in the hallway. Then he headed upstairs to his room, bumping his shoulder against the rails at intervals. He didn't care to take a shower, he just needed to dive into bed and drown the voices in his head. He found what he thought was his room. The door was half-open.
“Heaven.. finally.” He mumbled. He dropped flat on it and passed out.
The room was not his. The house was not his.
....
Jenny's car screeched to a halt outside her apartment. She had gotten home from work late again. After promising to focus more on herself than on work. But how could she when the upcoming project was the one that could put her company on the world map?
Her head was pounding from hours in front of the computer. She has had so much caffeine to stay awake that she barely felt a thing. Gently, she rolled her car into her garage and turned it off. Then she let her head rest on the steering wheel. She was exhausted.
The night was still, and the weather was chill. The moon shone above like a guard over her head. She pulled her bag from the passenger's seat, got out of her car. Then she walked towards her flat. Block C.
She reached for the door handle and stopped. Her senses became active like a thief in the night. Her eyes narrowed.
"All the lights are on." She whispered to herself. Her eyes moved to the window. "But I switched them off!"
She let her mind drift to the morning. She was sure she had switched everything off before leaving. Her heart started to race. Someone must have broken into her house.
Quickly, she pulled out her phone and checked her security app just to be sure before raising an alarm.
“Motion detected. Door opened. One hour ago.” it read.
Her chest tightened. Her eyes widened. Someone was inside her house. And as far as she could recall she wasn't expecting a guest. She made sure all her guests called before coming.
She quickly called the estate security. “Yes, this is Jenny from Block C." She replied after she heard a voice from the other side of the phone.
"Miss Jenny, how may we be of service?"
"Someone is in my flat.”
“Stay calm, madam. We are on our way.”
Jenny tried to stay calm. But the more she tried to wait for the estate security to arrive, the more her mind was racing. What if the intruder takes everything? What if they left before the security arrives? She was losing patience. She couldn't stand losing properties she had worked hard for.
She looked at her heels and without thinking, she pulled them off. Holding one in her hand like a weapon. Turned on her security app again and switched on the 'intruder alert signal'. Then, she took a deep breath and, with so much courage, she marched into her apartment.
---
Chukwuma was halfway to dreamland when he heard a loud voice echoing.
“Intruder alert! Intruder alert!”
He quickly jerked up and grabbed his phone. His visions were still blurry. He checked his security app but there was no alert on it.
“Ahhhhh." He grumbled. "I hate technology. It's a false alarm!" He yelled as if he were talking to someone in the room.
He walked to the security switch and bypassed the security system. He was still dazed. He still couldn't recognize that he was in the wrong apartment.
Just when he was about to go to bed. He heard a crash downstairs. He quickly grabbed the bedside lamp, scared. He was gradually beginning to sweat. He hid in bed and tried to think of his next action. But all he could hear were the voices in his head.
"Not on my drunk day." He mumbled. His breath rises.
He reached for his phone and called the estate security.
“This is Chukwuma." He whispered with fear. ''I don’t know… maybe thief… please come…” His voice was slurred.
He sat there shaking. His head, pounding. The alarm kept beeping. Suddenly, he rose to his feet. Swaying from side to side. The bedside lamp in his hand.
“Drunk or not. No thief will chase me in my house,” he muttered.
Gently, he opened the door and staggered out to the hallway. The lights were too bright. It made his eyes hurt. But he didn't care.
---
One step after another, Jenny moved. She could gear her heartbeat. She held on tight to her heel, her eyes scanning the sitting room. Everywhere, looked untouched, which she found weird.
But who switched the lights on? She asked herself.
She crept up the stairs. Her breath rising, her hands shaking. That was when she saw a huge figure coming down the stairs. She froze and wondered how she was going to attack such a figure.
She quickly hid and waited for the figure to appear on the landing above. She whispered silent prayers, clinging tight to her heels. Just when the figure was in sight. She jumped on him and attacked him from behind. Hitting him repeatedly with her heels.
Chukwuma yelled in pain and fell face-first to the floor.
“Who are you?! What are you doing in my house?!” Jenny asked.
Chukwuma turned. His body was in pain.
"Oh my God. Chukwuma?" Jenny called, surprised to see it was her neighbour. She dropped her shoes and quickly bent over to help him. She felt pity for attacking him that hard.
Chukwuma stared at her, squinting. "Jenny?"
"What are you doing in my house?"
“This is my house!” he shouted back. “What are you doing here?"
Jenny blinked. She looked around her apartment again, just to be sure. “This is my house!” she shouted. “You entered the wrong house!” Then she turned to him, and that was when she noticed. His shirt was half-buttoned. His eyes were red. "Are you drunk?" She asked, helping him to his feet.
Chukwuma swayed from side to side. "No… no… this is my flat…”
Jenny placed her hands on her hips. “Dudd, look properly! This is Block C! Your house is Block B!” she pointed to a picture on the wall. "That's my portrait."
Chukwuma rubbed his eyes. He looked at the portrait on the wall.
"No wonder when I walked in and saw that picture. I kept asking myself if I was married."
Jenny let out a shaky breath. Half laughing, half crying. "You're drunk. Let's get you home." She said and held him. Then they walked to the door.
Outside, they met the security team as they were about to enter Chukwuma's apartment.
“False alarm!” Jenny called out. “Sorry guys. False alarm! Just a mix-up!”
The guards looked confused. "False alarm from both of you?' they asked.
“Yeah. Turned out the intruder was my drunk neighbour here who entered the wrong house,” Jenny explained, shaking her head.
The guards laughed. Got into their cars and left.
Jenny turned to Chukwuma.
“You, you owe me one bottle of wine. And an apology.”
Chukwuma gave a sheepish grin. “I think one full crate will be better.”
Jenny laughed, the tension finally breaking.
“Come on,” she said. “Let’s get you some water and in the shower before you pass out on the floor again.”
[Image Source](https://pixabay.com/photos/houses-apartments-buildings-8618837/)
