One of my key guides in life right now is learning to avoid stress. And the question in the prompt—about whether one can ever get anything done without stress—is a legit one.
As a matter of fact, I believe there was a time I was overdoing it—the whole “avoid stress at all costs”—and one day in school, while people were panicking and hustling for a queue, I was seated somewhere reading my Lord of the Mysteries novel on my phone. I wasn’t worried because there was time and absolutely no need to rush. It was something that could have been done on any other day. But I guess people just wanted it to be over with. I, too, wanted it to be over with, but it wasn’t just worth it for me.
Then, while I was reading in a corner, a guy who I didn’t know—and he wasn’t part of us—came over and asked me what the reason for the commotion was. I told him, and he asked me whether I was done with mine, and when I told him the stress wasn’t worth it, he told me it was good the way I thought and he admired my spirit, but I should be careful not to become nonchalant; if not, I would “never get anything done.”
And just like that, I got priceless advice from a stranger. I didn’t even get his name, nor did he get mine.
I thought of what he said, and he was totally right. Indeed, anything worth doing usually comes with one form of stress or the other, and some things are just so stressful and overly dramatic—sometimes even more stressful in their own way—but are absolutely worthless.
So what I do is this: I know I can’t avoid every stress that comes my way, so I select them carefully and avoid the ones I don’t need, like unproductive arguments and emotional exhaustion.
Instead, I accept the ones that would build me in life—the ones that can’t be avoided, that matter and add meaning to life: starting a new job, determination, ambition, love, growth, and even peace. I read somewhere that psychologists call it “eustress”—good stress.
Trying to avoid all stress completely would mean avoiding life itself, or not having a bath and not brushing my teeth every morning and night, lol. You’d have to stop trying, stop caring, stop hoping—because all of those come with pressure. The trick, I have figured out, is to recognize which stresses are worth it and choose the ones that push you forward and give you purpose rather than tear you down and drain your spirit.
Some kinds of stress might seem worth it, but they aren’t—they are constant, unmanaged, and draining—for example, trying to meet everyone’s expectations.
I believe a totally stress-free life wouldn’t be balanced and can’t be seen as a full life. So, in conclusion, my advice would be not to “avoid all stress,” but to “choose your stress wisely.”
