The news of adoption isn't always an easy one to both the giver which is the (adopter) and the receiver which is the (adoptee) though I haven't witnessed it before. Still, all I can proudly say is the fact that I have seen it in movies, the whole reactions and everything. The very recent adoption movie I saw was some weeks ago, I vividly remembered everything that movie entailed and what it taught me. The way the adoptee reacted to the news was top-notch, she took it in as it all came and accepted her fate, I have come to realize that in life there are some things you can't change no matter how hard you try to.
Finding out I was adopted by my parents: Firstly I know it's gonna come as a very big shock to me, imagine being the only child that is being adopted but then come to think of it, currently, I'm the fourth born of my parents and why would my parents adopted another child when they have three children already "thinking out loud though" I know there are different reasons why people consider the adoption option and mostly is for early couples who want to experience parenthood but in this case "it's not adding up".
Such news isn't always easy to process so I'm not gonna rush into making any decision at the moment because such moments are accompanied by mixed emotions, I'm gonna take a lot of time to process the whole information and ask questions like "how was I even adopted?" and "where are my biological parents? are they alive?" if they are alive then why did they have to give me up for adoption "why didn't they want me?". Different thoughts are gonna keep roaming in my head because these people (my parents) loved me even though I'm not theirs, my siblings and I shared a kind of bond that is unexplainable.
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This is the family I've known all my life, the family I've gotten to love, whenever I'm sad they will be sure to know whatever is bothering me and look for all means to make me feel better, they are more like my problem solvers, they call me some nicknames that you can't find anywhere "You might find them though" but then these names have become a huge part of my life to the point that when I hear them, immediately I develop a smile on my face because I'm being called from a place of love.
My Reaction: I'm not gonna react badly though my feelings have been messed with but then I will try as much I can not to react unpleasantly and throw certain words with anger because "some words can't be taken back when uttered" I'm gonna be angry at them for not telling sooner why wait till now when I'm all grown up. Why did I get the same treatment as their biological children? And did my other siblings but not biological know about it? And if they did, why was I the only one that was being kept in the dark till now, or the light was too bright for me? I thought our number one rule was never to keep a secret from one another but then why am I the only one who doesn't know about this secret being me? I think I'm gonna have some trouble dealing with it but then it's the truth that I can't change.
After the whole anger has been quenched I'm gonna come back to my parents but not my biological parents and tell them how I'm feeling after they broke the news of my adoption and ask them questions about my real parent if they know anything about them. I believe there is a reason for everything "even secrets" Secrets are being kept for certain reasons best known to the parties involved. Maybe they were waiting patiently for the right time to tell me and I'm not gonna blame them for that "They say parents know better" and maybe that's why they've kept it from me for this long.
I strongly believe adoption isn't new to society any longer, gone are the days when people felt a certain type of ways to tell others about adopted children, there is no such thing as the "right time" Often the right time can end up being the wrong time (who knows) parents should tell adoptees about their adoption without them finding out later in the future. Their adoption should be talked about in the house, it shouldn't be kept a secret "A home built in secret won't be strong" Make their adoption known to them and make them feel loved and wanted like the others in the house, that way they won't be feeling leftout.
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