Sometimes in life one must disengage emotionally, in order to proceed. For example it's common parlance, especially in the informal negotiations in life, that this party or that, arrogantly declares, "I don't care!"
Sometimes, one must be incorrigibly stubborn... this is true. In a way, declaring that you do not care, takes fuel away from your enemies contention... at least temporarily.
It sounds rude perhaps, though it's important, as childish as it may sound, to not heed those things that are more relevant to the other party than one's own. Never relent. This little mantra of stoicism is a tool to keep ready in the arsenal of your proverbial utility belt of tactics.
Back in the nineties I remember getting into electronica music. One song I remember, relevant to this idea, was the song by The Chemical Brothers called "It Doesn't Matter." It's a great piece of music that really helped me drill this idea of autonomy and individualism into my psyche as a youth. I just want to share it to remind you that me, your personal introspector, and my steemit blog, are on your side. Your support means a lot to me and this blog.
Here is a URL if you want to check it out.
It always reminds me that sometimes when I actually don't care, I can simply instead say that "it doesn't matter." There is no avoiding the truth. This way, rather than sounding insensitive and apathetic, by implying that I do not have compassion towards the other party's situation (I'm actually a very caring guy), it instead sounds like we are still in agreement, though their contention is simply not viable, nor relevant, due to technical reasons which we can explore further, if they so choose.
There will be times when we will have to be a little less emotional, and a bit more thoughtful instead. For those times, you will have to turn down your volume knob for your emotions, and focus more on your thoughts and objectives.
So dear readers, please remember, it's perfectly fine for something to not be relevant, to not matter, and for you to not "care." This is because what should be paid attention to is actually far more significant and you must focus on that instead. Communication, particularly respectfully, will allow you to redirect and course correct your interlocutors. Stoicism will win them over, and if not, your impartiality will hopefully preserve your friendship and relationship. It's crucial to not allow your course corrections to potentially hurt or damage your relationship. Preempt that from happening.
Hope this tiny insight into stoicism will help you in tough times. Remember, it's easy to be stoic when things are going bad, after all, wouldn't it be nice to escape to a perfect world where bad things don't happen?
So, I hope you see, the key is actually to practice remaining steadfast when things are going great and you want to celebrate, but must instead just keep working in a normal steadfast hum drudgery manner on any day, good or bad. This has many benefits to you and your decision making, which we can, perhaps, explore in the future or in the comment section. For some, who cannot resist self sabotage in the face of success, maybe this will keep your nose to the grindstone instead so future successes are not just random events. Feel free to share a time when this age old strategem worked for you, or if and why you might disagree with me. I would love to hear your thoughts.
I also, I would caution those who see stoicism as apathy or nihilism, to instead see it as a form of empirical skepticism. It's a way to keep the topic away from your heart, so you can deal with it in an objective manner.
