Same old story, same old song

"Same old story same old song..."
That's what my life looks like. It doesn't matter how I feel if I'm tired or sick. I have to get out of bed early and work.
Today it's Sunday. Sunday means breakfast at bed for my parents, cleaning the house, Sunday school and back at home sitting on a chair for the rest of the day.

After my dad read the newspaper he dictated words I had to write down. All those words are difficult and he doesn't care if I heard them before or I had them at school. He says I have to be the best student of all. I don't want to be the best student and I don't like to write down bring words but if I refuse he will be angry. I am not allowed to refuse ever or say what is on my mind. I am not allowed to sing either. My dad says if you cannot sing if you don't know the words you have to keep your mouth shut. He can sing but I can not. He doesn't want me to say how I feel either. He says feelings don't matter only facts do. If I don't have facts I need to keep silence. I keep my mouth shut because it is the best thing to do. Only my mother never does. She can say what she likes, scream, yells and tells things everyone knows it isn't true. She always lies but he never tells her to keep her mouth shut.

I wrote down the words he read in the newspaper:
Finances
Politicians
Economical crisis
delectable-aroma
concentration-of-disadvantage
and more words I never heard of.

I didn't write it all in the right way and had to write every wrong word two hundred times. Two hundred isn't as much as five hundred or one thousand times like the teacher makes us do when we write something wrong but my hand still hurts.

Sunday
February 7, 2021

I am out of words. I think I am ill.

Monday
February 8, 2021

We had a test at school. I sat at my desk and couldn't make it. I tried, looked at all those numbers but thinking was too hard. I tried but it was pointless.
I can not count. The teacher knows but I still had to write the test and she did not send me to the corner to think about what I did wrong.
I never know what I did wrong anyway. No one explains it to me. It's the same if it comes to maths. No one explains it they think they did but if I don't understand it they didn't do their job right. My dad says the teacher gets paid for explaining and stupid questions do not exist.
My teacher is old very old.

Tuesday
February 9, 2021