Is this story about a monster? Maybe, the feeling that people can have when living in the city. Although, it's also a little story about this weekend's visit to the German city of Münster. It's about a personal experience during a temporary return to the busy materialistic city life. I love to visit busy cities all over the world, and discover the cultures and soak up the city vibes. Since a few years I feel that being comfortable in a city is becoming more challenging.
A lovely trip into a fairy tail
My German girlfriend invited me for a little day trip to a lovely town called Münster. I did not really look into it and immediately said yes. A 2 hour drive on grey rainy highways with almost constant construction work. A graffiti wall with a huge image of Einstein was the first more colorful thing we've seen in hours. Next challenge, get a parking spot. I am used to travel with a big van and park on the most beautiful spots for free. This city search for dirty concrete and bad breath wasn't my favorite activity. Level down, level down, level down...traffic jam in a parking garage. We managed to get a spot. Day ticket 18 euro's a day (which is about 20 USD). While walking up all the smoking levels, we ended up at an endless area of shops. Not the thing I had in mind for this medieval town that looks like wandering around in a fairy tale. Or was this the trick of a woman to conVINCE me for a day of shopping?
Understanding the signs between the shops
Strolling through the shopping streets of the old town...although most buildings are not that old. After the World War II the Prinzipalmarkt was rebuild in it's pre-war style. After diving a bit deeper in the history of Münster, it was quite a story. I thought the meaning of the name was 'monster', but is wasn't. It had a bit of history with a Dutch dude called John van Leiden, who turned this town into "New Jerusalem" in the 1534 during the Münster Rebellion. John of Leiden believed he would lead the elect from Münster to capture the entire world and purify it of evil with the sword in preparation for the Second Coming of Christ and the beginning of the Millennium. They went so far as to require all citizens to be naked as preparation for the Second Coming. However, the town was recaptured in 1535; the Anabaptists were tortured to death and their corpses were exhibited in metal baskets, which can still be seen hanging from the tower of St. Lambert's Church (according to Wikipedia). Now I understand why these cages were hanging on one side of the tower.
I discovered the fountain next to St. Lambert's and the spot were most online pictures of this town were made from. It was dried out. We went inside this church to escape the shopping madness. It was a throwback to the Christmas vibe. Christmas trees and stables all over. The inside church looked a lot nicer than the blackened tower outside. What got the attention was a lightened stairway, which hung next to the organ. It's called the "Ladder to Heaven" and should remind us of having dreams. A symbol of hope, faith and love. Well, today the angels missed the ladder...the ladder outside on the tower was not lightened. The artist made the way to heaven looking pretty steep, but easy to climb. Should we start to climb to our dreams?
Back to reality outside
As soon as we walked out of the gate, we stumbled over the bikes outside. The cities has more than 300,000 inhabitants and around 60,000 of them are students. That explains the huge amount of bikes everywhere. My girlfriend was distracted by all the shops and it became an in-and-out of interior shops, delicatessen stores and coffee shops (not the Dutch version). I was shocked. Pots and pans of 345 euro's, knives of 400 euro's. Did hyperinflation kicked in here? Did I climb the ladder and ended up in a weird dream?
Lost in translation
I am Dutch, my girlfriend German and we communicate in a mix of my-bad-German, English, Dutch and sometimes even French. This causes some misunderstanding from time to time. Not only about a town of a monster. For example, we were looking for some kitchen utilities. Kitchen in German is "Kuche". But there are words that sound similar: "Kuchen" (German for pie), "Kuchen" (Dutch for coughing), "Kusje" (Dutch for kiss) and even "Kutje" (Dutch for vagina). When you communicate and use different languages in one sentence, it can cause some pretty weird questions...
"I need a new knife for in my Kuche"
Uh what?! You want to put a knife in your vagina?!
You can imagine, we still don't really understand each other that well.
Smelly cheese
Shop after shop. And more bags were carried. Getting a bit hungry. We found the huge market outside. No matter where we went, the line was endless (and I am not talking about cocaine). Buying some flowers then. This place feels a bit Dutch. Cheese stands from the Netherlands, Dutch licorice stands, tulips etc. We wanted to enter the St.-Paulus Dom, but there was some mass going on. We continued to another church: Liebfrauen-Überwasserkirche. And what happend here. My girlfriend told me a story today about partners in a relationship that fart, it is a sign of love she said. There was a huge guy on boots in front of us and when we entered the church, he showed his sign of love. This fart...wow, is that thunder outside?! It was endless, he could play a whole song if he put his ass on the church organ. The bells started falling out of the tower, the Christmas lights in the trees were crushed and we ended up in darkness, the...shit, I was getting fart-o-high on this smell. Where are the flowers? I need to put my nose in something fresh.
Even when I looked at one of the church doors, I felt like tripping. I wanted to grab the handle, but it looked like a person...
My girlfriend reminded me, that we still had to buy some smelly goat cheese at the market. I told her to ask the shameless fart-dude where he bought his piece.
I am lost
Back at the market, we found the cheesy stuff. At some point I was reading the text at the sausage stand. One of the sausages was called "Polizei Knupfel". Seriously? I don't want to have any cop's sausage in my mouth!
Let get into the Dom, welcomed by some high voices singing Three Kings songs. It seems like my girlfreind had a record-button and kept singing on repeat all day. The Dom was actually pretty beautiful, although the crazy fart has been ahead of us...that smell here. I have to say something positive though, all churches are free to enter. That compensates the parking ticket. And the architecture in the holy buildings is amazing.
We almost forgot, we were hungry. Brauhaus 1 extremely expensive, brauhaus 2, still freaking expensive, brauhaus 3? Forget it. Let's move on. A few windows got our attention...some plumbers garbage was called art and had a cardboard sign with "5,999 euro's". Next window some old working boots with a cardboard sign "Prada, 699 euro's". Another window got our positive attention: Frikandellen (not the Dutch version), Kartoffelsalat, Crispy Chickenfilet, Pistache almond snack....let's do it. Get the number: A00. Is this a sign for getting back to zero? 5 people working, 5 counters, but the number on the digital screen didn't change. These people were extremely slow. Was I in a hurry? No, but we were hungry. It was like everything was in slow motion. One staff member was using the meat slicing machine as if he were carefully cutting his mother-in-law into pieces. The other staff member began to sigh deeply with every customer question. We decided to do a bit more window shopping outside and returned with still the same number. Our turn! After half an hour, that was quick... 2 pieces of crispy chicken filet and a small pistache cookie-kind-of-thingy: 25 euro's. Am I losing it, or did I really end of in a weird dream after climbing the ladder?? Or is this reality these days? This crispy chicken was tasty, no offense. But this shop asks even more than Jandino's FC Kip in Rotterdam (A Dutch comedian started a takeaway chicken restaurant, with extremely high prices, he got roasted...not grilled).
Time for a coffee, become sharp again. I scared my girlfriend with a warning there was a mouse in the kitchen.
You should not lie to me!
Seriously, look...there it is. Although it was painted on the door next to a little hole.
Confusions all over
Coffee was finished and with a fresh hyper mind I went outside. WTF?! I thought I saw people walking around with a tiny alpaca on a leash. Was there something in that special pistache delicatesse, was there something hallucinating in that green stuff? It seems that it was a strangely cut black poodle, with a tight black suit.
Can we go home? I asked.
Yes, just one more thing
My girlfriend doesn't have the best sense of direction, it could take a while. We got into an alley and finally there it was. Glühwein! A damn good one I must admit. And like a sign earlier today said "Every Day Is Friesday", we ordered some. Full of tasty spices. I loved it.
I have to do something, I'll be right back ...she said.
I was in heaven with this orgasm of tastes, sitting on a high table. So I did end up in heaven today. At some point an angel came down I thought. Someone was under the table and touching my legs. Hmmm...what's your plan babe?
OOPS! It was a toddler looking at me with his big eyes. He got lost and he bumped up into my private area. You see, I was not the only one getting lost today.
Marvelous or not
Wasn't this a marvelous day? Well, I really liked the MARVEL-shop. I enjoyed some of the tastes. I laughed and enjoyed the old holy architecture. On the other side, I do understand why I left the big city and run away from it years ago. Spending way too much...not only in the stores, but also spending too much time to park your car. Waiting long for the basic things in life. This consuming and busy life, I passed that phase. Today I had the feeling that I got mentally lost from time to time. And don't even start about getting lost in translation...
In the evening I asked my girlfriend if she wanted some 'Sekt' (this is how Germans call Prosecco)
Ow yes, finally some sex!
Uhm no, I just asked if you wanted some sparkling stuff...
