One thing most average individual who left home to find one job or the other with the intention of feeding home is suffering from is what is tagged Black Tax, I didn't even know such actually exist or didn't realize it named black tax until last year. When growing up, I do wonder what actually went wrong after seeing people hustling and working day and night but they never leave that particular position, instead of getting rich or acquiring things for themselves, they keep getting poorer and broke. At times it pop us this question "Is this really what they call Life"?. I don't really understand it then, I thought it was a curse or form of disease going around, as long as you are in the average class, you get struck by it one way or the other. As a young boy then, I always view my dad with one kind of eyes, with a little question within me, where are your money going to, why will it finish before the end of the month, I couldn't ask because I can't imagine the punishment that will come with it, it was later that I finally understand the kind of stuff he was actually going through.
Sometimes last year, I happen to see my roomie in some kind of troublesome mood at the end of the month, I even though he was having mood swing when I saw him but somehow I saw a paper on the table full of stuff he jot down, do I picked it up to check and somehow I can't laugh after scanning through. He has a job and had to leave the house every early in the morning everyday even while I'm still on bed, he will come back around 7-8pm daily and even late if stuck in heavy traffic, this was his daily routine except on weekend and at the end of the month after removing transport fare and 1 time meal, he is left with just 40% of his total salary, now in the list, he as to send almost 30% back home as the first born just because he need to feed home, use 5% for debt and he is left with 5%, all he could utter was when will he start saving or finally be able to settle down, at that point I had no answer or advice because somehow it is compulsory to look after your family, it is one duty for first born that can't be neglect especially if they are looking up to you.
Came across a show on youtube where a lady ask a question " she left her country and travelled oversea to work and get her life together while helping her family along side, every month she always send money home and even when the burden was much for her, she wasn't really bothered, after some month, she found a way to bring 2 of her siblings oversea and one of them is a tech guy who now earn way more than her but he never help out or find a way to lessen her burden, instead he use most of his money to buy luxurious things, cloth and shoes. She said she complain to her mom about it, asking her to always demand extra money from him since he earn more but all her mom could say was to let her brother breath, when he finally settle down, he will be helping out", that statement really hit her somehow. So there was a day she needed to pay for a course and she couldn't, so she asked her siblings to help her with some money but the one earning well refused while the second gave her part of the money, with such behaviour she decided to just focus on herself and also stop sending money home, she saved up and before she know it, she was doing well for herself, got a house and car then move there to stay alone with her bf. Now the issue is, her siblings are facing hard time, their mom is now abroad living with the siblings but they all now want to move in with her in her new house and she is planning to not to listen to them.
One thing I can note in her story is the fact that she faced what most people do face, we believe we have our younger ones to take care of, it is one duty we bestow upon ourselves especially if they are looking up to us, so no matter what we earn we always send some back home, you might be lucky enough to have some family who are considerate but most times the unlucky ones are much, as a person, if you have many dependent on only you, it will be a problem especially if you are yet to live well for yourself, imagine subtracting yourself from the equation, they will surely survive on their own. At times it is really good to focus on yourself, build yourself instead of getting entangle and just be a pawn, help when you can, do the little you.
