I had so many friends in school and college. Today, only three or four names remain on that list.
I still don't know if I am right or wrong about this. I only know what I have seen. Just because you call someone a friend, it doesn't necessarily mean they feel the same way about you.
When people say someone is using you, they usually mean for money. No one ever asked me for money. There is another kind of 'using' that is very hard to recognize because it looks exactly like friendship.
I had a friend in college. She was going through a difficult time at home; she used to overthink things and was constantly troubled by domestic issues. She would share everything with me—or at least, that’s what I believed. And I was always there for her—emotionally and mentally, at any time.
Gradually, I realized that the dynamic was one-sided. I was her friend whenever she needed me. The rest of the time, she had plenty of other friends, and I wasn't part of that circle.
There is one thing about me: I feel other people's troubles very deeply. If someone shares their problem with me, I keep thinking about it for days—wondering how they must be feeling and whether they are okay.
That is why her calls often came late at night. She would tell me everything, feel unburdened, and fall asleep—while I would lose my sleep.
Then she got admission to another university, and I started a web development course. Calls would come once every three or four months—always when she felt lonely and had no one around her. Even when she came home for the holidays, I wouldn't know about it; she wouldn't meet me. But if she needed something, the call would come.
That’s when i realized and decided to distance myself and not overdoing anything
So, I distanced myself—not just from her, but from many people. It hurt for a long time. To be honest, sometimes it still hurts.
Now, only three or four friends from school and college remain. Whenever I meet them, the atmosphere is always just as it used to be—no awkwardness. They don't judge me, speak ill of me, or put me down. Before sharing anything about themselves, they ask how I am doing.
That is the only difference, and it took me years to understand it.
I honestly don't know if I handled it the right way or not. Has there ever been a time when you were the only one giving everything in a friendship? Did you walk away from that friendship, or are you still in it?
Disclaimer: All images featured in this blog were generated using AI. Translations were assisted by Google Translate.
