HERE WE GO!

Where to begin. Oh, I know, at the beginning. XD

A whole 365 days almost went by without my learning anything resounding or significant, to my growth as a lady. Thanks to a conference I attended in November though, I can use the word 'almost' in that sentence. I made a post about the scenery of the Conference Centre. Have a look here, if you'd like.

The lessons I learned which have impacted me as a lady, here we go.

• I learnt that I complain a lot. LOL. Okay that's not really a lesson, is it? Well, in a way it is, because by my acknowledgement of this vice, which I obviously was ignorant of, I learnt many other lessons. For example: to constantly register your displeasure of a situation, is complaining, you shouldn't do that. It's exhausting for the people around you. I learnt to offer up whatever suffering or difficulty I face at any point in time, and just do it for the love of God. Yeah, sounds religious but really, it works.
° I learnt that giving reasons (excuses) as to why a request can't or won't be granted, or why a task can't or won't be completed is also complaining. It usually comes off as an unwillingness to help, and it paints the picture that one does not care. The lessons taught me that I could manage my time better, because if I did, I'd have the time to help others without feeling robbed of my precious time. I mean, if I'm being honest, I did and still do spend hours seeing a movie or swiping and scrolling through social media. When someone comes along at a "bad time" (while I'm studying or have work to do), I'd complain. Of course I'd complain, since I hadn't achieved much, through my own fault. I mean if I spent those hours reading or working, I wouldn't feel robbed or the need to complain right? You catch my drift.
° Anyhoo, in general, I learnt to help and be of service to my loved ones cheerfully, without a single word of complaint, despite the timing or difficulty.

I know I'm a go-getter. I know that if I put my mind to something, I'd achieve it so yes, I can be of service, and still do my own thing. This has forced me to manage my time better, especially by making a list of priorities.
What's more important? What should eat up most of your 24hours? What do you have to loose if you do not do this, or if you do this? Yep, these questions are becoming part of my everday and I'm loving the results.

I also recently learnt that I don't have to "argue" over everything. Not that I do argue over everything, but this answers the second contest question.

What would I do differently in '24? Here we go.

I would not argue as often as I already do. I'm actually still learning the real meaning of the word "argue" as used by my friends and family. When I used to complain a lot (oh it feels good to use this in the past tense, I've improved a lot these past few months 💃🏾), I thought I was merely stating whys, explaining, etc. But nobody saw it that way, it was seen in a bad light, hence the changes. Same goes for arguing. I think it's basically a back and forth thing but I'm not quite sure. Either way, none of that anymore. I tend towards a fight to set things straight, establish wrong and prove a right. I guess it's because I'm a lawyer. It should be left at the offices though. That's almost toxic for informal relationships. I know now, and I will, going forward, not argue everything out.
° I'd learn to disagree within myself or maybe out loud and just leave it there, without arguing. I could make solid points, only if asked, without arguing.
° I'd also, as I'm already trying my best at, not let things get to me. At least, not easily, for starters. If a loved one did or said something to offend me, I'd remind myself in that moment, that they mean it from a place of love and are limited by their own idiosyncrasies, or perspective on life and move on. Without letting it change my mood, or wanting to harsh it out.
° I will also, as I've learnt, and are still trying hard to implement, not worry over things that are beyond my control. Hakuna matata right? This is as simple as it gets. It's common knowledge that worrying solves nothing. Rather, it invites more problems.

I think the above can pass for new year resolutions, but of course, not as fleeting as those, I hope. There's an actual resolve to do or not to do, and because I didn't wait for the year to begin before employing them, and seeing as the results are very beneficial to me, my personality, my peace of mind and my mental health, they'll become part of who I am, and/or who I'm becoming.