I couldn't help but stare at her as she made her way slowly over to where I was sitting. She had just been turned over by the school officer to the teacher in the class, who then instructed her to take a seat. Her white blouse and black skirt made her stand out in a class full of more than seventy pupils dressed in a uniform of red and yellow stripes. Being a public school, our class was packed, just like every other class. Additionally, late starters can't get a seat at the front and, in the worst-case scenario, might not find a seat anywhere in the classroom.
I was mesmerized by her presence and couldn't quite put my finger on why my heart was racing as she moved into the column of space that separated each column of chairs and tables. Is it her stature, her gorgeous round face, or her eyes? Sincerely, I don’t know. But what was sure was that I was eager to say hi to her. I don’t know what compelled me to tell my other seatmates (as we sat in a group of three on the classroom chairs and having four was inconvenient)
"Let's adjust for her since there is no seat she could sit in at the front unless at the back, which most times is full of unserious students"
I quickly persuaded my seatmates when they gave me an unexpected look and attempted to complain about my suggestion.
In the most kind way I've ever spoken to a female, I remarked, "Hello, you can come and manage with us," as she passed by.
Her face seemed to shine like the early morning light, and her eyes brightened. I was certain she never anticipated that type of generosity from anyone as a newcomer.She grinned as broadly as I had ever seen and
added, "Thank you."
The more than seventy pupils in the room were chatting away in the background while the teacher had already started writing again on the board. I had shifted my attention from the board to the new girl.
"What's your name?" With excitement, I inquired.
"Hannah," she said softly.
"Hello, I'm Tomi," I said, quickly introducing her to my seatmates.
I turned my attention to the board and started writing, peeking at her now and again. I was able to have a lengthy conversation with her when the teacher left the room, introduce her to other friends who were sitting nearby, and go over the key information she needed to know about the class and the school in general. We were in the 2nd year of high school, and I was barely 13 years old.
The next day, I got Hannah a seat with some female friends sitting at my back. I discovered that Hannah wasn't academically brilliant, and since I was among the top 5 in the class, I made sure to assist her with assignments, tests, and homework. We became very close and became best friends.
As a young boy who just became a teenager and just started experiencing puberty, I had never developed the feeling of love for any girl before, so I don’t know what that feeling was at that time.
Following several months of friendship, I gradually noticed that all I could think about was "Hannah" during class and that I was unable to concentrate on the teacher or the board. I dismissed it at first since it wasn't alarming. Then it became worse; I would become afraid and start to get alarmed when I began seeing Hannah's face on the board in math class, which is one of my least favorite subjects. Throughout the lesson, I found it harder to stay focused, and as a result, my grades on tests and class evaluations started to suffer.
I felt like I was being haunted, and I had no one to share this experience with. The defining moment came one Saturday when my dad requested that I shine his shining leather shoes, and I noticed Hannah's face on them. I was afraid.
"What is going on with me? "Am I losing my mind?" I let out an inward scream.
There was no adult I could talk to, even if I wished I did. I had no idea how to describe this new sort of sensation to anyone, and my dad seldom had time to talk to me. At the time, it was the oddest emotion or circumstance I had ever encountered.
As a 13-year-old who grew up in a very superstitious nation, I always strive to think more logically than my peers, since I was exposed to science at an early age. But right then, no science could explain how I felt. I started thinking superstitious things in my head gradually.
“Hannah might be a witch; she must have charmed me, as I can't stop seeing her everywhere." I have to protect myself from her. I mustn’t fall.”
"What can I do to stop being haunted by her face?" I lay down on the bed and looked up at my room's ceiling, asking myself this question.
I then had the notion, "Just stay away from her."
I started getting more thoughts into my head as if they were being downloaded from the cloud.
"Make sure you make her dislike you, don't go to break with her, and limit your interaction with her."
Even though a lot of individuals in the class understood that we were close friends, some of them childishly referred to us as a couple. The next week, I resolved when I returned to school to cut down on my friendship with Hannah at all costs. She sensed that I had started to treat her rudely. She asked why, but I didn’t give a reason.
She had always relied on me and my friends for answers during tests and exams. Then slowly, I began not providing any answers to her. And it got worse over time, and I started misbehaving, totally unlike the gentleman I was when she first arrived. My bad behaviour towards her climaxed in a big fight with one another, and that ended our friendship.
Although I was pleased that her face no longer haunted me, I also felt guilty about how I had handled our friendship and was left with mixed feelings since I still liked her. Even after transferring to the third year of high school, we didn't reconcile. After the third grade, she abruptly departed our school.
Anytime I remember this period, I smile as I realize how naive I was and how scary my first love experience was. I also felt bad about how rudely I treated Hannah, all because I was superstitious.
