The way that you present this RSVP is intriguing, bringing the reader into the dynamic between this pair in a fun way. However, in the end you change perspectives, which jolts the tale. Since you told the rest from the perspective of Jane, it would have been nice to see us finish there, perhaps with a bit more information on this mysterious painting. Regardless, there is a lot of creativity here! Thank you for sharing your story with us, and for your engagement with other members of the community.