At some point almost every child is going to want to have an allowance. There will always be things that they want to buy. There will be the "IN" clothes. There will be the latest tech. There will be the most fashionable jewelry, bling, or whatever they just have to have. If you are like most people you want to give your children the best that you can. For many people giving to your children is a way of saying "I love you"
In my house my children started getting money at a young age. At 5 years old I wouldn't buy my son treats at the bakery but I would give him enough money for him to go and buy it himself. Under my guidance of course. A little later I made a "wish book" for them where they would write something they really wanted into the book. Every week if they remembered we would look at the book and I would add one dollar into the money towards getting what they wanted.
The idea was they could save up for anything they wanted, but it would take time, and they had to be intentional about it.
Soon after that they got an allowance. The amount was absolutely restrictive but it was enough for them to start spending their money AND think about how they wanted to spend it.
I remember one of the first things my son wanted to buy:
I remember thinking to myself. What a stupid purchase. Spending cash that you can use anywhere to buy a card you can only use at Starbucks.
I remember walking with him to buy the gift card and talking to him about the purchase before he got there. I still thought it was stupid but I didn't tell him that. I just calmly told him that he was spending his cash which was good at EVERY store to buy something good at ONLY Starbucks. Of course he didn't listen because he really wanted his own "credit card".
Did he learn that it was a mistake? Of course. A few days later he wanted to buy something and I told him he had his Starbucks card. He whined "but the card doesn't work there" and I just smiled and said "I know". I didn't give in and he learned a lesson
Which is the whole point of the allowance. My son got a chance to learn a valuable money lesson. I got to "teach" my son but the small price of a Starbucks gift card.
Plus it saved me money later.
Allowance day was once a week, every week, and on the same day of the week. They knew money was coming. They knew that they could save for whatever they wanted. They also knew that I would say NO to impulse buys unless it was important for school.
If I heard the kids say "Dad.... I want McDonalds" my response was pretty easy "Great.... Are you paying?". Sure, sometimes I wanted McDonalds and said no. Sure, sometimes it made sense and I said yes. However, in general the kids knew that if they wanted something they had to save for it.
Which also allowed me to introduce "You have to work for it".
The allowance they got was my sneaky way of teaching them restraint, budgeting, and money skills. Of course as everyone knows, there is NEVER enough money for everything you want. If you want to get more you have to work harder. If my kids wanted something extra? Work extra. There were always tasks and chores the kids could do for extra money and always an allowance if they didn't feel like doing the work.
My kids made some truly awful financial decisions. My inner self almost cried when my kids entered their "Hype Beast" phase and wouldn't buy anything that wasn't designer (or at least look designer). Way too much money spent on clothes that went out of fashion way too quickly. Then when they started importing Chinese imitation brands AND they got bills for foreign customs? I just asked how they were going to pay their debt (which came out of their allowance of course.. with interest.. in installments).
Very quickly they learned that fashion is fickle. They also learned about foreign taxes, tariffs, customs and other payments required on online purchases.
Now my kids are 20 and 23. Both of them have had multiple jobs. They have made a lot of money and unfortunately spent a lot of money. However, the tools they learned when young have helped them immensely. Sure they still make mistakes. Like buying expensive vehicles that use premium gas and need regular maintenance. However, the basics they have learned and they keep learning with every mistake.
I am glad that I was able to give my children an allowance. When I was growing up my mom was flat broke and couldn't give me any money.
However, the allowance was never to buy their affection or to give them money for stuff they wanted. It was always a tool to help them learn financial literacy which is a very useful skill. Allowance was "tuition fee" for real life learning. But I was also very careful to strictly limit it. An allowance too large and the kids don't value the work that went into actually getting the money.
Hive Learners asked if I should give my kids money since I'm already paying for all their needs. They asked if I could do it financially. They asked if I did it for the little things that always come up.
My answer? I could and I did give them an allowance. It was cheaper than giving into their constant demands and helped them learn. Did I feel bad because I was already providing everything they needed? Not at all. It was just part of educating my kids. Was it for little things they needed here and there? Not really. I took care of the needs but people always have wants and their allowance was there to help them get some wants while also teaching them want control.
Not everyone can afford to do what I did...
.... Money is scarce for many people.
But for my kids?
.... The money given was "tuition fee" for lessons that have paid off many dividends over my kids lives.
And that is my take on the Hive Learners prompt. I'd love to get opinions in the comments below and if not writing a comment? Thanks for reading, love eyes on my posts. Thank you.
