I covered the turd in gold dust and paraded it around the city
people would stare in disbelief
and ask to take pictures with the turd
as they posed gold dust
would inevitably stick to their cheeks
but they were so happy to have a picture of themselves with the turd.
and days later people would talk about the turd
and all the gold dust
and they would praise the turd
and elect
to make it king of the land.
KING TURD!
and everyone worshipped king turd and would attend the mass, and rub the gold of the turd
and they would be married under the turd
and go to war for the turd
and kill for the turd until
one day
someone went to the toilet and saw a turd in the bowl. and suddenly
the turd
was no longer
special