You only live once.
A friend of mine said this today when he was talking about getting a second car, which he doesn't need, but wants for a "bit of fun" as a run-around. He is one of those people who constantly has car fever, often changes his car, and also has buyer's remorse because he knows what a bad purchase it is, and what he should have done with the money instead. But that "only live once" mentality has a strong pull, doesn't it?
And it generally seems to be used when spending money on something that isn't necessary, like a car, a holiday, or some other emotional purchase. Not many seem to say, "I am going to write a book, because you only live once" or, "I am going to start a business, because you only live once", do they? It seems to be reserved for known wastage only.
A consumer choice.
An investor decision might still be to spend on something that doesn't earn money, but it will provide value. For instance, something like buying a new car brings only a short term dopamine hit and at least for the majority, it soon normalises and the feeling is lost. So the question is what kind of purchase or activity is going to bring the most value for life return?
My friend's partner likes to travel and for many, it seems like it is worth the experience to see the world and get to know other cultures. Yet, I believe that for most who say this, it is largely an excuse, considering that they don't actually explore that much, and stay where they are comfortable - which is where they already know. Taking a tour bus around, isn't "getting to know the culture" of a new country. And I wonder, how many people remember their holidays abroad, when they have gone every year for a couple decades? I suspect there are pieces they remember, but they all start to blur - like all the beautiful churches I have been in on my travels.
I don't know for everyone, but I think that one of the issues is that when we splurge, we buy something "special" that is outside of our ordinary lives. This makes sense, doesn't it? Since we are looking to have or do something we don't normally have or do. However, I suspect that this is one of the errors, as if we instead invested into improving our daily lives instead, we would have something we value continually. The trouble is, there might not be quite as large initial dopamine hit, even though it will compound more value over time.
For instance, my friend was looking to spend between 20-30 thousand euros on a second-hand car to have some fun with. However, he has a beautiful and massive patio that surrounds three sides of his home, and he loves to cook - especially barbecue. However, this is Finland, so the patio is only in use for part of the year, before it is filled with snow. But, for a fraction of the car price, he could have part of it enclosed with glass so he can use it year round, and for another part of the cost of a car, put in an outdoor kitchen, or a really fancy grill. And he would still have about half the money left.
We splurge on highlights, but perhaps when we are thinking about treating or rewarding ourselves, we should focus more on our daily average. If we can improve the average of our daily life, we will likely generate far more personal value than if we have a few highlights here and there. Maybe what we should be doing is instead of buying escape from our daily life, we should be buying a daily life that we don't want to escape from.
Easier said than done?
Maybe. But I suspect that a lot of what is valuable in our daily lives gets missed, because it is normal and doesn't stand out. It is our lack of awareness that reduces the value in our eyes, because we are blind to what we actually value. As the saying goes, "We don't know what we've got until it's gone" and I reckon that this is an opportunity area to invest into. If we take stock of what we actually value and then spend time investing into those areas, we will end up focusing more of our resources on what is important to us, rather than it being spread on what might feel important in the moment, but return very little to our lives in the next.
People can do what they want with their money and some people have enough that they can spend on useless and not really feel it at all. However, even those people would likely improve the quality of their life by focusing their attention on what they value. And you know what? Most people don't actually have a very good understanding of what they value when asked, and they aren't able to just say what they value off the top of their head - which means, it isn't in their daily mind.
Shouldn't it be though?
If we truly know what we value and have it in our conscious awareness, all of our actions can be in service to it daily. We can get the sense of doing what we value daily, without having to look forward to some future purchase or event. We can still do those things too, but we can have a more active approach through everything we do, bringing quality of life value to the journey on the way to the highlights, rather than just waiting in anticipation of the future.
I like cars, but I don't care about the car I drive, other than it being safe, reliable, and comfortable enough. If I had endless amounts of money, I could upgrade, but even then, there would be limits because for me, there isn't much live value in the car I drive. I do value relationships though, but in the past I have often let other things get in the way of them partially at least, rather than focusing extra attention on where I value. This meant that there was a lot of pressure on the time I was paying enough attention. I am getting better though now and investing into daily relationship value, rather than the highlights.
In time, it will hopefully have a better return.
Taraz
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