Besides it being cool, cloudy and constricted - I quite like this summer. There are a lot of things going on around the house, but we don't actually have much to do all the time. And we don't have much planned, so we are seeing what is around that we can do, that firstly is fun or interesting, but also pretty cheap. And after dropping off our loan dog to its owner, and eating some cake for pappa's birthday, we headed to an outdoor pool centre for a swim.
As you might be wondering, outdoor pools are pretty uncommon in Finland due to the weather, but there are a couple around. And while it was only low twenties today, it is only getting cooler in the coming week, and it might be one of (if not the) only time we can swim comfortably outdoors. And even today, we weren't in the water for too long each time, because even Smallsteps was getting cold. And when she is complaining about getting cold and not wanting to swim, it must be pretty cool.
We had fun though. And we packed a bit of a picnic and sat on the grass talking and watching the many hundreds of other people similarly trying to enjoy Finnish summer.
Take what you can get.
What is nice though is that Smallsteps now recognises what are good days, and without the sarcasm I might say it, she often says "this is the best day ever". She knows of course that it isn't but it is still a good day. And She and I were talking about this a bit today also.
If you focus on what you don't have, you will never enjoy anything.
Which is a pithy thing to say and is rather meaningless, unless one thinks about it. And Smallsteps didn't think about it, so I gave an example of a birthday party with chocolate cake and strawberries, ice cream and watermelon. And then crying because there is no candy.
The thing is, there is always something missing that might make the situation better. No conditions, no product, and definitely no people are perfect. Yet we are continually taught to focus on what we don't have, rather than what we do have. And again, while this seems so´, so simple and so obvious, as well as so known to adults - we all still do it.
Or will you claim you are above it?
Dive in.
We tend to take a pretty soft view to our own shortcomings, which is a human trait designed to protect our ego. Sure, some people go to extremes the other way and are far too hard on themselves, but do you think that is you?
I know I catch myself far too often worrying about what I don't have, rather than enjoying what I do have, and it is a cost to my wellbeing. I am getting better, but I am also wary that I don't fall into the trap of "settling for anything".
People settle for a level of despair they can tolerate and call it happiness.
- Søren Kierkegaard
Are you happy, or are you settling?
But that is another article entirely.. so I won't go there now.
Instead, I will be happy with the best day ever which ended with ice cream in the city, and be thankful that it was a good day as a family. Tomorrow, rain and storms are expected, so we will be indoors, but maybe with a little bit of thought, it might be another "best day" playing some board games while getting some housework done.
Taraz
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