I remember those days, as a child, when although we were very smart, the devil used to play with our mumu-button(heads).
Then, one time, my mother called me and asked that I go get some items from around the neighborhood for her. She listed out a number of stuff which I repeated after her to be sure. She even asked that I get her a pen and paper so she can put it down in writing but the big boy in me declined. She told me,"If you buy rubbish and come back here, you go know who born you. Come back before this spittle dries otherwise, your navel would fall off" she had told me as she spat on the floor.
I was scared. Immediately, I took the money and ran out, determined to get back fast.
Truthfully, that day, i had been indoors all along. You think I was being a good boy? Lol. My parents were home. Who born me to go outside and play when they are home?
I just wanted to go outside and catch some fun.
As was the regular, I was reciting the items…"tin milk, if Dano milk no dey, buy Milo."
In a case like this, like mine, where you have to recite the items because they are too many and you might forget a few things, something might go bad and trust me, they always go bad. Every single time.
One is that, while you’re going, you meet your friends playing football. However strong you are, forget it. You will join them to play one leg and believe me, that football that day will be the sweetest you have ever played. From one leg, you will play until you guys mistakenly destroys someone's bucket.
Another thing is that, while reciting your song, you come across an elderly person whom you have to greet or who would see you minding your business and stop you to ask one nonsense question. How will you even ignore?
Immediately you start to greet "good mor…," everything will wipe from your head. What you’ll be singing then will be remixed.
This here was my case. I was generally going and singing my song when Daniel's mummy saw me running along on the road.
I said my greeting to her. And like that was not enough, she stopped me to ask, "how are you? where are you going? What do you want to buy? Who sent you?" That was the absolute end for me. I could not remember a single thing my mum had sent me again.
Stood like a statue In the sun and was seriously praying to God to remember. I even promised to put offering on Sunday if he reminds me of what I was asked to buy. Ha!
God is merciful nau. I remembered it was milk and in bits, my song came to memory. It was still quite a distance to the store so I was chanting the song and moving slowly. Did not want to run too fast so it doesn’t fly off my head. I was going and singing…
"buy milk, if dano no dey, buy milo"
As if the universe was against me that day, I came across those CD sellers who push their wares in a barrow and play loud music. The music playing from those speakers are always banging and me, I lost focus.
From my normal song-recitation, I went,
"One tin, if dano milk no day, buy Milo"
"One thing I no go do for my Milo"
to
"One thing I no go do for my Philo'
I'd shake my head and so some dance freestyle. To make matters worse, the CD guy was going in my direction and it was impassable to ignore the sweet music.
On and on. I was just dropping different remix back to back.
Close to the store, I saw Alex, my
friend, he asked me, 'how far?'
I replied, 'one thing I no go do...I dey. How far na?... for my Philo.'
When I go to the store,
Seller: what do you want?
Me: one thing I know go...stop Jesus!!!
In my mind....gan, gan, gan, gan!!… My mummy don kill me today.
Long story short, I went back home and there was a court sitting with my mother as Dr Sope O.T law and Barrister Ugo C Shege.
That day! Ha!.
Words alone cannot describe it.
I hope you enjoyed this.
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