Yesterday pulling up into my driveway I pop the trunk to get some stuff out when I heard a voice from over in front of my neighbors house call out my full name. I'll admit I pretty much keep to myself and the voice didn't sound familiar so I am curious as I turn to see who it is. There's a women exiting the vehicle as a huge guy is coming around from behind it. She's slowly starts walking towards me, half crouched over, holding something in her hand and a tag dangling from around her neck. I am thinking with the way she called out my name in full and was creeping slowly towards me this was going to be some sort of take down event, like as in law enforcement coming after me for something. Law enforcement are usually the ones with an inclination to be calling out someone's name in full. Likely sensing the alarmed look on my face the guy, who's walking upon the sidewalk by now, tells her he's going to stand over here. I get this eerie inclination to want to look at what's possibly coming up behind from the other direction but decided I'd better stayed focused on the bigger foe at hand as I'd only have about thirty seconds to get my pepper spray out of my purse in an attempt to ward this monstrous man off. I knew I hadn't done anything wrong and I wasn't going anywhere.
He pretty much stays stationary in front of my neighbors house as she slowly continues her half crouched position towards me. She's got this smile on her face you'd see of a long lost friend or loved one who'd be apprehensive in wondering if you'd be glad seeing them again. At that point I am thinking this isn't law enforcement, they'd done gone for it, they wouldn't waste no time playing crouching tiger hidden dragon game, they'd done went for the take down or had their guns drawn. As the guy is staying stationary still, and these people aren't seeming familiar to me I decide it's best to take a quick glance over my shoulder to the other side to see if they aren't just distractions for anyone else to be coming up alongside me on the other side. With no one coming up from another direction, and ruling out this is law enforcement, I still have a few moments left before she gets to me due to an empty lot between the neighbors house and mine to ponder who the hell this is creeping towards me. My mind races to maybe someone from the city or someone with a court order to haul me off somewhere, but I called by the due date of the 21st to arrange for my rental housing inspection and they wouldn't come out looking for me, they'd just send me a letter giving me a fine for not scheduling in time. Which I've had to argue my way out of before because it slipped my mind once. I am now out of time for my mind to continue it's query when she stands up straight and announces her name and that's she's from Team MAGA with a broad smile across her face and just short of those moments you feel when that long lost friend or loved one opens their arms for that loving, are you happy to see me embrace.
At that moment I was flustered to hell and back, all that for this, really, and that's exactly what I said to her in astonishment because I couldn't believe they'd go to this length after not responding to a dozen texts from the RNC about who I was going to vote for as to actually send someone out to your house. Never in my life during a political campaign have I ever witnessed such sheer desperation.
First it was Kimberly Guilfoyle a few months back texting me her patience was wearing thin with me, who was rather insulting in her approach. Followed by two texts in the proceeding weeks from Don Jr, and Eric Trump. There were two texts from Kelly Ann Conway with a link to view a special message from her, to hurry and respond as the link would only be there for a few minutes. In between all those were pleas from Trump himself wanting to know, a couple times demanding to know, are you going to vote for me again. The last one was yesterday at 11:43 a.m.:
From Trump: I NEED TO KNOW.
Are you voting TRUMP?
I hope to read all responses before MIDNIGHT
https://trumpmaga.vip/072zSx
Like you really think he's going to be reading all these responses personally. Talk about people who can't get a clue that it's none of you business until election day. Whatever happened to that "element of surprise?", you know, that day that's suppose to be a secrecy to catch someone off guard they won. Isn't anything sacred anymore. Geez, give me a break. I am surely beginning to feel like I need one. Which is sort of what I emphasized to the women who was now standing there with a disappointed look on her face asking "you don't want to do the survey?" No, I am worn out on people wanting to know who I am going to vote for and I don't want to be a spoiler for election day.
I am beginning to feel like the next thing you know they'll be chasing me down the highway at a hundred miles an hour, trying to crawl under the stall in a public restroom or "who are you going to vote" for will pop up to the top of my Alpha Bits cereal.
