A toddler turned into a cheerful girl who turned into a smart lady and is now a mother too. How life changes us and how we fit into a role. It looks like it comes from within and is unconscious. To an extent it is but greatly it is imbibed too.
The journey from a toddler to a girl to a lady is fairly simple because each time you have to change for yourself. You grow how you want, according to your whims and fantasies. But the journey from a lady to a mother is not only effort-consuming but tiring and stressful too.
So yesterday I went shopping and I noticed that I had stopped observing shops that meet my needs. My focus was more on the shops that met my baby's needs. So I would ignore the brands that offered stuff for me and keenly peep into shops that offered kids clothes and toys and stuff like that. This is a big change and it has not come unconsciously for sure. It required effort. There is a conscious sense that has gone into this drift to make me realize that now I am a mother and my baby is my responsibility. I have bought him into life and it is my responsibility to give him a good life. This necessarily doesn't mean giving up on yourself but it does require prioritizing their needs over yours.
A lot of actions I now perform come from what he would like and feel good about. I was too tired and sleepy in the morning and didn't feel like coming to the office but I got ready and didn't pay heed to my tiredness. But the moment my son cried seeing me going, it felt like I should stay at home.
No matter how difficult or painful or stressful this journey is, it's always remarkable. It is pure love, right now not seeking any expectations. This is now what I imagined my life to look like but honestly, there's no going back either.
To all the would-be mothers, it's a journey worth taking. Relish every moment, it's something you will carry with you for the rest of your life.
