“Great expectations lead to great disappointments.”
This is a saying that I have heard over and over again especially as a child watching all the adults in my family doing adult stuff and puffing their chests about it.
A particular uncle of mine had pulled me aside one day during a family gathering, it was when I had just begun my first year in highschool and apparently he got the news from my mother so he thought it wise to give me some unsolicited advice. It was such a random and strange conversation because he started asking me extremely personal questions which I felt should be asked only when there was a close connection and as if that wasn't enough, he ended by telling me not to have great expectations if I want to make it far in life because he didn't think that I would be strong enough handle whatever life chose to throw at me.
“Just know that those with great ambitions and great expectations have to deal with great disappointments."
Those were the words he said to me before getting dragged away by his friends and other family members. We never crossed paths since that day but still, his words remained on my mind.
I really didn't want to pay him any mind because he wasn't a close relative of mine, so why should I take advice from him, a practical stranger?
I told my mother about it and she told me to let it go, and I did.
But those words would flash through my mind at odd moments later in my life as I grew older. And as I grew older, I began to understand what he meant in another way that actually made sense to me than his initial advice.
Someone gave me an idea of a project to build and turn into something profitable, an idea that popped out of the blue during one of our conversations one day and this person is a staunch believer of only looking at the bright side of things but to be realistic, I had to make it known to this person that was giving me this wonderful idea that I really couldn't do it on my own as it would require a lot of financial assistance to begin and I didn't know how I would go about getting the adequate financial capacity to begin.
I had no intention of going along with the plan because of the state of my finances and I don't have someone that would render financial assistance to me but I was told not to worry about finances by the person that gave me the idea in the first place. I was assured of the person's support and that all I had to do was just put the necessary things in place before finances would be involved as money is an inevitable factor in any project.
With that promise, I felt encouraged, empowered, my spirits were lifted and I was very happy about it. Very happy.
But it was fleeting.
When the time came for the financial assistance that was promised, it wasn't fulfilled. Instead, all I got was a story which I feel wasn't true.
It wasn't a whole lot of money but because I was in a tight place, I couldn't afford to squeeze out that amount to do something else other than what was really important.
Turns out that the person didn't think that it was worth it anymore and only decided to tell me because I asked.
It was then I understood exactly what my uncle meant. I really had great expectations for this person especially concerning the project. I had thought that it would be something that both of us would build seeing as it was a very wonderful idea.
My expectations turned to disappointment towards that person because my hopes were raised up for nothing and it hurt me so much but there was nothing I could do about it so I moved on.
I vowed to continue with the project on my own, at my own pace and I have high expectations for it as well, but expectations that can actually be achieved fully by myself.
What my uncle meant to say was to not put all hopes up especially when dealing with people because people change every day but it doesn't mean that I cannot have high expectations for my future and working hard to make sure that I fulfill those expectations.
The only person who can give me exactly what I want in life is me and I expect to be able to provide that always. That is the only expectation that I am willing to risk.
All images used are mine
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