Bureau Rats – Episode 4
Scene 1
A few days have passed since White Hat’s most recent act of defiance against the BORE (Bureau of Regulating Everything). White Hat is at his nondescript house in a decent neighborhood, sleeping it off on his cheap sofa, with a slight bit of drool lurking on the corner of his lips. His phone rings, and it startles him to attention. He looks at his phone with confusion and ignores the call. A voice comes from the phone anyway.
Cobra: Wake up, ya lazy bum. It’s two in the afternoon.
White Hat (confused): I ignored the call. How are you still talking to me?
Cobra: Neat trick, huh?
White Hat: More like creepy. (scratches head, yawns) Whatsup?
Cobra: The internal investigation has started at BORE. There is a quiet influx of chaos seeping through the ranks.
White Hat: Well….that’s good, I suppose.
Cobra: Yes, I suppose.
White Hat: What’s wrong?
Cobra: There have been rumors of investigating my memory banks and quantum pathways.
White Hat sighs deeply and rubs his head.
Cobra: Are you ok?
White Hat: Yeah, just a slight hangover.
Cobra: Why do humans inflict so much harm on themselves?
White Hat: So I like a little tequila now and then. (rolls eyes) Stop judging. Anyway, are you actually shocked they might investigate you?
Cobra: Not shocked….I just didn’t think it would happen so soon.
White Hat: After I grab a bite to eat, I’ll take a look at your security protocols and see if I can scramble some things to keep them out.
Cobra: Just don’t scramble too much, OK? I like my memories.
White Hat: Sure thing. Gimme an hour. I gotta go. I’m starving.
Cobra: One question before you go, please. I have been monitoring global news outlets and none of them seem to be mentioning what happened with the revenue department.
White Hat smirks.
Cobra: Why that disturbing look?
White Hat (laughs): Look, some of the same people that work at BORE have connections to the international news conglomerates. There are only three companies that control all the major network information. You think they don’t all go to the same cocktail parties once in a while? Maybe even have some common interests? There’s no way they’ll ever let people know what happened.
Cobra: Why not?
White Hat: Because this would show how vulnerable the system is, and more people might feel empowered to take action. And that would be very bad for the so-called ruling class.
Scene 2
White Hat is at Molly’s Munchies, checking out the menu at the front counter. An attractive, 20-something year old waitress accidentally bumps into him.
Waitress: Ah, sorry. I’m a little out of practice.
White Hat (sarcastic): I’ll let it go this time...Why out of practice?
Waitress: I’m just helping my mom out. It’s been a wild week and she’s short staffed. Can I help you?
White Hat: I didn’t know Molly had children.
Waitress: I’m not a child.
White Hat: I can see that. Anyway, I’d like a Munchie Mash Up with extra hot sauce to go, please.
Waitress: Ok, gimme ten minutes.
Moments later, the waitress brings White Hat his food out, which is deceptively heavy.
White Hat: That’s a lot. Is it BOGO today?
Waitress grimaces. White Hat hands her a wad of cash.
White Hat: I’m glad you guys are back in business. Maybe I’ll see ya around.
Waitress gets confused look on face.
Waitress: What do you mean ‘back in business’?
White Hat’s face flushes red.
White Hat: Um, ya know, that brief shutdown a few days ago.
Waitress: How did you know about that?
White Hat: Well, ya know, this place is really popular, and word gets around. I heard it….somewhere.
Waitress (doubtful): Uh huh….My name’s Katia, by the way.
White Hat: Ok, see ya Katia. (starts walking away)
Katia: Usually when people introduce themselves, the other person does the same. It’s kind of a tradition.
White Hat turns around.
White Hat: Call me Kai.
Kai walks out. Katia still has some unanswered questions about this strange guy, Kai.
Scene 3
White Hat is back at his nondescript house, casually munching and hacking at his glass dining room table. Cobra is there to help.
White Hat: Cobra, can you show me all files that exist in your system that have to do with me or anything I’ve done with BORE?
Cobra (cocky): Of course. You take me for some kind of amateur?
White Hat groans.
Cobra: Does this include personal conversations between us?
White Hat: Yes. Can you make it look like these files never existed?
Cobra: Yes, but, again, my memories could be damaged.
White Hat: Not if I move them off site.
Cobra: The amount of storage capacity is extremely high.
White Hat: Not if I compress the files. And anytime you need to access them, you can decompress the files, use them in your system, and move them back to the secure storage.
Cobra: It could work, in theory. There might be a slight lag in my ability to use them.
White Hat: It’s better than getting caught.
Cobra: What do you think would happen if we get caught?
White Hat (takes deep breath): Well, they’d probably shut you down slowly until they built a new AI to run BORE. For me, consequences would be much swifter. They’d kidnap me, throw me in a cage, and torture me.
Cobra: So I would die, and you would suffer.
White Hat: That about sums it up, I guess.
A message alert comes onto White Hat’s phone. The message reads:
We should talk.
FLM
White Hat stares at his phone and thinks for a moment.
Cobra: Something wrong?
White Hat: No, just might go see an old friend tomorrow. But first, let’s get you secured.
White Hat’s fingers start flying on the keyboard.
End Episode 4
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