chuck Norris doesnt play russian rulet with a revolver... he plays with a .50cal desert eagle

Chuck Norris won the 2014 Pulitzer Prize for his 874 page short story called "Me, Chuck Norris".

Mother Nature and Father Time came together and made Chuck Norris, But his name wasnt always Chuck norris because its latin for I WILL KICK YOUR ASS.

There are no disabled people. Only people who have met Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris did offer to dance with the Devil on the pale moonlight but the Devil said "not a chance, not with Chuck Norris"!

Chuck Norris is what the butler saw.

John F. Kennedy in his famous speech actually meant this... "It's not what the Goverment can do for you, it's what you can do for CHUCK NORRIS!"

Chuck Norris knows where your car is - in his stomach.

Chuck Norris was named valedictorian of his high school on the first day of his freshman year.

When Chuck Norris plays a game, every minute is potentially "Sudden Death" for his opponents...including cards and board games.

Johnson & Johnson spent $3.5 million in developing Band-Aids for Chuck Norris which are made of lead based Kevlar lined with an asbestos absorbent pad and adhesive bands coated with Super-Glue. However,

Chuck Norris was originally going to be in Cowboys VS Aliens, but the movie would have been over in about 3 minutes and 7 seconds.

Chuck Norris was once bitten by a Rattle Snake... After 3 Days of suffering the rattle snake died!

Hammertime does not stop Chuck Norris

For 'American Sniper', Bradley Cooper got acting and beard-wearing tips from Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn't fly, gravity collapses around him.

when the devil went down to georgia, he wasn't looking for a soul to steal, Chuck Norris got in and took over hell before anyone could tell him to get the fuck out.

Helen Keller's favorite color is Chuck Norris.

The Chicago Cubs just signed Chuck Norris to a one year $2.5 billion contract thus assuring a 2012 World Series title. The contract, however, is contingent upon the Cubs also signing Albert Pujols...as

Chuck Norris knows what you did last winter.