In this life we walk many paths, we experience many things, some pleasant, some unpleasant. We live from one happy moment to the next and just endure the shit in between. But I believe it really just comes down to one thing. Laughter. The quality of our lives is measured in the amount of laughter we create. It's not about material possessions. It's not about how much money we have. It's not about doing back flips for others to feel useful. Its about making memories. Happy memories preferably. At the end of the day, that's the only thing no one can ever take from you, the only thing you can't lose (unless you lose your memory but that is a different topic altogether). After a very rough and life changing year, I chose to stop running around for people, to stop being used, to stop looking for approval (although I never really did care much for approval anyway). I decided to hell with it all, to hell with the people that only pretend like they care because I am useful and care only for those who genuinely care for me. It made my world so much smaller but also easier to handle. I can't be the only one to find life overwhelming at best. This summer I decided to end the mother of all depressions that hit me like an atom bomb last year. I found myself walking with my dogs and my boyfriend (and every other week with the kids, as my ex took them every other week during the summer holidays) day in, day out. We must have walked hundreds (if not more) of miles in parks, woods, around lakes, through fields and over mountains and we laughed so much my jaws and ribs hurt and even the slightest suggestion or facial expression has me in stitches again. Yep, life is about laughter. About good times. About seeing the beauty in this world. About love. About appreciating what you have without desiring more. And although I still have good days and bad days, I can finally say my good days outweigh the bad ones. I finally feel loved and appreciated for who I am. And I honestly don't think I ever felt that way before!
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