I always have had a weaker health.
And these past few years my health problems had gone trough the roof.
But what I consider one of my worst enemies and obstacles for my recovery is Fear.
Fear is the true enemy.
As I have said in a previous post.
I have pretty bad anxiety problems.
But also alot of irrational anxiety.
One of the biggest ones of these is emetaphobia (Fear of vomiting).
This fear is completely irrational and I suspect has been one of my greatest limitations.
Since my health problem is based around my stomach this fear has skyrocketed.
And maybe even caused by it in some ways.
The moment I get nausea its as if my body automaticly turns into the fight & flight reaction.
I have been trough therapy for this.
And trough therapy I have managed to make it so that it does not control my life that much.
And it has helped me a great deal to take back a huge amount of control of my life so far.
But I still have a stomach problem. And when its really bad the fear still comes back.
Its usually when I feel healthy that It doesn't bother me too much.
Now I have been looking online to see if I can find people that have managed to completely conqeur this fear. Sadly there are only a few. So I can't learn too much from other people's experiences.
But I have decided to make it one of my main goals to completely eradicate this irrational fear once and for all, without a trace.
I feel as if when I eradicate this fear many of my anxiety's will dissepate with it.
This will be one of my main purposes in life. I know it is possible to do it if I can muster enough courage,
and change my mindset far enough to break this barrier into pieces.
One of the reasons I think I became sick is because of that fear. My worst symptones started with a stomache flu. Everybody around be had it and had to vomit. But I somehow managed to keep myself from vomiting at that time because of my fears.
I think this in part might have damaged my system.
I know direct exposure to my fears will not work that easy either.
I always tought that if I'd get to face my fear I'd get over it. But I once did.
And when I did it actually became worse. That is why I want to change my mindset. Hopefully face it some day under the right circumstances.
I want to keep sharing my experiences online here.
Probaly write a post in the future about the tricks I try to use to brainwash myself out of this fear.
And hopefully share my experiences hoping it will have a positive influence on everybody.
Thanks for reading.
Wish you good health and positivity
