Some people get so busy building for others that they forget to build for themselves. The demands of life can increase so much that you can even forget that you are part of it. A lot of people spend their life working so hard, supporting their family, helping their friends, meetings various expectations, and even trying to make the lives of the people around them better. In the process of doing all these, they may push their own dreams aside, overlook their happiness and their personal growth. You have to understand that you deserve a place in your own life. You do not exist only to meet the expectations of others, but you are to take ownership of your own life too.
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There is nothing wrong with being kind to people, or supportive, or available to others. But you should not forget that you are also someone who deserves love, care, attention, and fulfilment. Imagine spending your whole life trying to make room for other people, yet without creating any space for yourself. This can be exhausting and unfulfilling. You have to know that you were not born to be a supportive character in other people's stories, but you are the main character in your own story. Your dreams should matter to you, your happiness matters too, and your future deserves attention. This is why you have to take your own matter seriously. Trust me, a lot of the people you are going a mile for may not even go a meter for you when you need them the most.
You also need to stop postponing your own happiness. A lot of people make the mistake of postponing their happiness. They will tell themselves that they will become happy when they get the kind of job that they want. Or that they will take care of themselves when they have enough money. Or that they will begin to pursue after their own dreams when everyone around them is settled. There is someone I know who would rather focus on helping others than even attending to his own needs. I am not saying that there is anything wrong with it, but you also matter. Imagine, he would keep reserving his best clothes for special occasions and end up not wearing them. He would not take care of his own needs, and would also tell you about other people's bills that he is settling. The funny part is that there will always be someone else to help.
It is worthy to note that your dream deserves to be given attention. Understand that you cannot build a meaningful life if you constantly abandon your personal ambitions. Those dreams that you have been nursing for a very long time now, you need to put actions into them. You might want to further your education, or start up a new business, or build a skill, or change your career, or even explore more opportunities beyond your immediate environment. Whatever your dreams are, you have to put actions into them, and then commit yourself towards pursuing after them. You may not have all the resources that you need at the moment, but there is still something that you can start with. Take that step that you have always wanted to take, learn continuously, make the necessary sacrifices, and remain committed to your progress.
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In addition to this, you have to learn to choose yourself without feeling guilty about it. That you are to be there for others does not mean that you should abandon yourself. Sometimes, choosing yourself might just mean saying no to certain things, especially things that do not serve any good to you, then setting boundaries, taking a walk from situations that drain you both physically and mentally, and refusing to sacrifice your peace just because you want to please everyone, which is not even possible. Understand that not everyone will understand your decision, but it is perfectly okay. Also note that taking care of yourself does not mean that you are selfish, but it is actually your responsibility. You cannot continue to contribute towards others while constantly overlooking your own wellbeing.
You have to be an active participant in your own life. At the end of the day, your life is your responsibility and yours to live. Do not watch others fulfill their own dreams while you just get yourself trapped in the routine of trying to please everyone. This is why you should make decisions that reflect your values, pursue the opportunities that will encourage your growth, learn from your mistakes, and then celebrate your achievements and successes.
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