A lot of people believe that their physique, outwards appearance, handsome or beautiful face, bodily shape, etc are their strong attractive points. Well, while this may be true, it is still not the entire truth. A lot of other things may make one attractive to others. Obviously, it is worthy to note that what you find attractive in others may be found repelling for others. This is actually the reason this quote has it that:
Beauty lies in the eyes of the person that beholds it.
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A few years back, I did a little experiment: I just randomly sampled my friends' opinion to know what they find attractive in other people (especially of the opposite gender) and I was surprised at the answers a lot of them gave. Just very few people talked about the body shape et al. Weirdly, a friend of mine revealed that people's eyes are what he finds attractive in people. Some others told me that the way people smile is what they find attractive. In all these, I came to realise that we are attractive to each other in ways that cannot even be imagined. This is why I also believe that being attractive or unattractive is only a function of the perception of the beholder.
In this era, a lot of people are so much focused on only the outwards beauty and thinking that it is the only thing that counts and they also think it is the only thing that makes them attractive. But they tend to forget other factors that one can find attractive even though it may not be quantifiable. Take this instance: the way you speak confidently and your composure may be your best selling point, even better than being beautiful. Also, your act of kindness, availability and readiness to help people may also be perceived by people as a force of attraction. As a matter of fact, in nature, there are more to life than just appearing beautiful or handsome.
It is true that one's appearance may contribute extensively to how people are addressed, at least because of the impression it creates. However, if all you could offer in life is just your physical appearance, then your relevance is very questionable. There was something I experienced sometimes ago. I went into an organisation to get something done and I met a young lady there who works there. She was an embodiment of beauty, with a perfect "coke bottle" shape. One would easily find such a lady attractive.
However, when I tried to engage her in a discussion relating to the service I wanted in the organisation, her attitude was so stinking. I mean, the rudeness at which she responded to me and the way she spoke reduced the attraction I saw in her. Imagine if I wanted something serious with her or maybe I wanted to recommend her to someone, I would immediately change my mind. In fact, the longer I spoke with her, the less I find her attractive. I quickly remembered this statement a friend once made and I saw truism in it. He said:
A lot of people are attractive until they speak.
That was the exact case with the lady. Maybe she allowed the fact that she is beautiful to enter her head and she acted on that. After I was done speaking with her, I could not even believe that I once found her attractive. When I thought I was the only one that she was rude to and I tried to share my experience with my friends, they also confirmed that it was her character. Over the years, I have come to understand that character can add to or subtract from someone's attractiveness. That is, having a bad character subtracts from one's attractiveness while a good character is an addition.
I once met a young lady. At first, there was no noticeably or beautifully striking feature on her face. But when I got to know her a bit more; her good attitude, humility, excellent character, etc, made her to start appearing attractive.
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Another thing that people find attractive in others is their sense of humour and obviously their ability to create an easy atmosphere around them. There are some people that when you stay with them, you cannot help but keep smiling. After a while of getting used to their humour, you will begin to attach it to their personality and you will find them more attractive. This is why I believe that the more comfortable you become with someone, the more attractive they are to you. One way to create this kind of comfort around people is through your sense of humour. However, in all these things, one thing is certain, attraction is relative to individuals and not a "one formula fits all."
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