As an ambivert, it's a bit hard to choose between being an introvert and being an extrovert. Just to queue behind one of these two extreme personalities, especially the one in which I express more, I'll say I'm non-social. I have friends, family, loved ones, colleagues, and extended families I spend quality time with, but I am not always available for social activities.
As a non-social person, I am not always comfortable with this personality, especially when I look at the effects it has on people around me. I really love my space, and no matter how happy I get amidst friends, there's the inexplicable joy I derive from silence and being alone.
Looking at the gifts God has bestowed on me, there are times I need silence to think, to write, to edit, and to offer solutions and better ways of doing things. Sometimes, I get inspiration amidst my friends or in public, but most times, I get inspiration in silence.
The reason I'm not always comfortable with my personality is because people sometimes find me weird. One moment I'm playing with everyone and getting along, and the next moment I'm nowhere to be found. I've had situations where people confronted me and asked if I had any fears, medical challenges, or mood swings. I really find their line of thoughts amusing and a bit disturbing because I don't count being an introvert as a challenge; it's rather a blessing to me.
I've had to anchor events, programs, and even coordinate several other social activities, so I never had a phobia for social things; it's just my personality to want my space, especially on a daily basis. While growing up, it was a hard pill for everyone to swallow, especially in a setting where every other person believes we all have to do things together.
Before I was 18, I already had the confidence to sleep alone in a big family building. Everyone wanted to travel, but I wanted to be alone, away from all the noise and disturbance of people. There was a second batch of people going to the location my family traveled to, and my parents actually thought I was going to join them; maybe I'd be too scared to sleep alone in the house. To their surprise, the people told them they met the gate locked, and after knocking several times and I didn't open the door, they had to leave. I can't forget feasting on the foods in our freezer back then.
One thing I'm confident about is the fact that there are more benefits to being non-social than its downsides. Your privacy is safe, and you won't have to watch your back often. However, the downside is having no one in your corner just in case you are in need of help.
Thankfully, I am not a total non-social being, so I may be an introvert to a large extent, yet I'm grateful for the little social traits I display. All in all, my personality has brought a lot of good things to me, and I see it as a blessing rather than a burden.
