Sometimes it looks like everything is falling apart and all you do fails, but you have to stay strong. Night is always darkest before the dawn and your life is just the same the hard time will pass it can take some time but surely it will pass, everything will get better and the sun will shine brighter than ever.
When you go through the hardest of time the people that come to your for aid are the ones that you will carry with you forever. The people that don't, no matter how close you think them to be, should not be the part of your inner circle, pain and hardships held highlight, who is, who has and who will always be there for you throughout the roller coaster of life.
Someday everything will make perfect sense. So for now, laugh at the confusion, smile through the tears and keep reminding yourself that everything happens for a reason.
Just live the way you are living and enjoy your life.